


Orderly Lives

by Gamebird



Series: Grey Order [5]
Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: An exploration of life and culture of the First Order, F/M, Sequel to Grey and Complicated, world building
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-28
Updated: 2018-02-02
Packaged: 2019-03-10 13:44:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 32,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13502735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gamebird/pseuds/Gamebird
Summary: This is a continuation of Grey and Complicated, following Rey as she leaves the Resistance and learns what life in the First Order consists of. The First Order has a leadership crisis they have to settle concerning Kylo Ren’s assumed role as supreme leader.





	1. Flight Up

_Day 9_

If shuttle three had a more permanent or formal designation, Rey missed it. The First Order had landed two shuttles that held mainly diplomatic staff and two that had full complements of stormtroopers. Naboo had lodged formal protest over the troops, just as they had about the dreadnoughts and other ships. The protest was noted and, as far as Rey knew, ignored. But the Order had left their numerous guards at the shuttles during the negotiations. Now, they were all on their way back to the fleet.

Although Rey had met everyone but the troopers in the main compartment of shuttle three, Ben introduced her to them all over again. This included the four troopers, whose designations he rattled off with ease and she struggled to remember more than a few digits of. Ben was fairly humming with excitement, grinning with happiness as he let each and every person know that this was Rey and Rey was going with them. With him. It was embarrassing, not least because she could tell that most of these people had never seen Ben smile in any genuine way. They looked confused, but pleased for him, and smiled back in good humor.

She couldn't tell if the troopers smiled. Their helmets stayed on. They sat together near the door. She couldn't help imagining someone like Finn inside each of those sets of armor. She wished she knew what they looked like, but it didn't seem proper to ask.

About the time Ben had run out of people to show her to, Hux came out of the cockpit to speak with them. "We should talk, Supreme Leader," he said, looking at Ren and then towards the back of the ship.

He was clearly speaking only to Ben. Rey looked around at the friendly faces, not sure what she would do. But Ben touched her on the side, so she turned and accompanied them to the aft cargo compartment. It was full, leaving only a narrow walkway between stacks of boxes and crates bearing the Naboo logo. She saw her own small chest up high, to the side, with her staff affixed to it.

"What's all this?" Ben asked, looking around as though the area had been empty on their way down to Naboo. They ended up in the walkway with Hux at one end, Ben in the middle, and Rey closest to the door.

"Cargo," Hux answered. "I wasn't going to overlook the opportunity to pick a few things up."

"I thought you said we were broke." Ben shifted the latches on one of the boxes he could open without catastrophe. "Did you steal this?"

"No, I did not," Hux said without the exasperation she would have expected if that were an unusual question. "Everything's paid for, or it should be. You'll get a report. I never said we were 'broke'. I said we will be if we can't get the core world matter settled." He hesitated for a moment, then said, "I'll have the chief financial officer meet with you to review the First Order accounts. That's something you'll need to know."

"Yeah," Ben said distractedly, pulling a small, clear bag out of the box. It contained a thimble-sized part with wires hanging from it. "What are these?"

Hux looked at it blankly. "I have no idea. I gave the quartermaster a budget and priorities. Most important was medical supplies. I'll be as surprised as you when I see the report on what she purchased. I'm having to rely on others, because you've kept me with you the whole time, concerned I might shoot you in the back if I got too far away!" He sounded annoyed.

Rey leaned over and pulled one of the parts out for herself to get a better look. Digging through junkyards had given her a keen eye for valuable components.

Ben looked over at Hux. "To be fair …"

Hux rolled his eyes. "Yes, fine. It was a valid concern."

Rey interrupted. "I know what this is." Ben lifted the bag and she nodded, showing the one she was holding. "It's an intra-ship identification transponder. You put them on droids or ships you want to keep track of inside your own ship, so the system knows which bay something is parked in or which corridor a droid is patrolling. If you're really careful, they can be reprogrammed for a new unit, but most of the time they don't survive removal. Five portions for a working part."

"Five portions?" Ben asked.

"Five days food," Rey said. "That's what Unkar would pay on Niima Outpost, or at least what he was paying last time I brought him one." She looked in the box Ben was still holding open. "You have a whole crate of them," she said in amazement. Of course, Unkar wouldn't pay five portions per part if she'd brought him this many (bulk discount, he would have said), but it still would have fed her … forever. She looked around at all the other packages.

"Ah," Ben said quietly. He tossed the bag back in with the rest, so Rey did the same. He let the box close.

"That sounds reasonable," Hux said. "With all the shuffling about of equipment we've been doing recently. Now, about her," he said, looking at Ren, not Rey. "You need to assign a member of your staff to provide an orientation. They need-"

"I can do it," Ben interrupted.

"No," Hux said firmly and patiently. "It needs to be someone else so that she has ties on the ship beyond just yourself. Unless you intend to keep her cloistered?"

There was a long pause while Hux looked at Ben expectantly. Ben finally said, "That's a real question? No. I don't." There was an edge to his voice.

"Yes, Supreme Leader," Hux said gravely. "It is a very serious question. There are pros and cons to it, but mainly, I have no idea of your intentions. We've never discussed anything like this and we're no longer on Naboo. You may do as you like. If you intend to handle everything for her, then let me know."

"I'm right here," Rey said, not appreciating Hux's insinuation that she was powerless and had no voice in the discussion. Ben looked back at her. Hux did not. Rey was starting to think it was a good idea Ben was physically between her and the grand marshal.

Ben took a deep breath and turned back to him. "My intentions are that you treat Rey the same way you would … how did you put it yesterday? Like the honorable romantic partner of a fellow officer. Something like that."

"Good." Hux nodded. "That's what I was describing before you cut in on what I was trying to tell you."

Ben leaned against the cargo on one side and grimaced. "Go ahead then," he said with a tired sigh.

Hux did. "They need to be a senior member, but close to her age. Same gender. One of your staff, not mine, whose duties you can spare for the next week. They'll need to coordinate the things she needs – clothing, supplies, systems access, anything else. I've already sent ahead notification to security, for her to have access to common areas only and her quarters. Do you want to adjust that?"

Rey leaned on the cargo on the opposite side. She crossed her arms, stuck somewhere between wanting to complain about being a third-party to the discussion and yet being fascinated by the process. Because these were, she knew, important things to be settled – the nuts and bolts of how things worked – and even if she inserted herself into the conversation, she didn't know how to answer.

"Add my quarters," Ben said. "The hangar bays. The restricted training areas. Simulation pods. Observation decks."

"She can go anywhere when you escort her," Hux reminded him.

"Add those areas so she can go there when I don't." Again, there was a slight edge to his voice.

Hux got the message. "As you command." He moved on. "Security should find her shortly after docking to get biometrics and have her put into the system. I've set up her rooms across the hall and down one from your own." He looked past Ben and finally at Rey to say, "If he gets called away, just follow the portage droid that has your things. If you get lost from that, have me paged."

"Page the grand marshal of the First Order just so I can find my room?" she asked dubiously. "Why wouldn't I ask someone in the hall for directions?"

"Because if they're doing their duty, they will have you arrested. You are boarding a military vessel that is on war footing. Unfamiliar, unauthorized personnel such as yourself, out of uniform and wandering the halls, are to be immediately detained. I do not want an accident of any kind. Use my name as soon as you are challenged. Please."

"Or mine," Ben said. Hux gave him a steady look. Ben frowned. "Never mind. Use his."

"What did he say?" she asked. "Talking without involving me isn't enough? Now with mind-reading so I can't even overhear?" It was rude.

"It's not that," Ben said. "He pointed out that his people are more loyal to him than to me, and that he's easier to find because he doesn't block out hours of the day to meditate," Ben looked at the ceiling in annoyance (at Hux, not her) as he continued, "or to fly TIE fighters, or to exercise in strange places. He works two shifts, he's usually within reach of his comm link …" He frowned and looked at Hux. "Did I miss anything?"

Hux gave an innocent smile. "I also have a reputation to responding to communications by speaking with people, rather than choking them or damaging equipment with a laser sword. So." He turned his eyes to Rey. "Use my name."

"Oh," Rey said quietly, chastised but not guilty. "You only thought it to him because it sounded disrespectful to him and you didn't want to say something like that in front of me."

"Exactly," Hux said. "But, moving on, you will be assigned an escort to your rooms, or Ren will do it, so it shouldn't be an issue."

"I get to walk her to her room?" Ben asked facetiously. "You don't have some reason why that's not possible?"

"Yes, Supreme Leader," Hux said with a smile, "you get to do that. I would suggest that you also assign her two guards on duty at all times. Have them check in with you at the start of each shift and I would suggest you vet them thoroughly each and every time. I'll have Captain Phasma send you some candidates." Ben gave him a sober look and nodded.

"Guards?" Rey asked.

Hux said, "You are the paramour of the supreme leader. It would be wise."

Ben asked, "Why paramour? That makes it sound wrong. Illicit."

Hux countered with, "She's here to accompany you. Not to accept your proposal. Unless I misunderstood." Which let Rey know Hux had heard exactly what she'd meant. From the look that went over Ben's face, he hadn't realized it until now.

Ben looked back at Rey with reservation, then to Hux. "That's a private matter. I'm not going to talk about this in the cargo container of a shuttle with you here, Hux."

"Then give me a different word to use," Hux insisted. "There will be public things I will have to say about her."

"Partner; bondmate?" Ben said.

"Pick one. You're the one who didn't like paramour."

"Bondmate," Ben said. He glanced at Rey for her approval and got a nod. She liked it. Nothing was implied that was untrue.

"Very well," Hux said. "Your bondmate needs guards. They can also assist with providing directions until she becomes familiar with the ship's layout, if her personal assistant is called away for some reason."

"Why do I need guards?" Rey asked. "You said it was a military ship and unauthorized people weren't allowed."

"He's worried about assassins from the High Command," Ben said. "It's …"

"Just a contingency," Hux said. "Ren uses the Force to figure out what's likely to happen so he can safely ignore everything else. I can't. So I have contingency plans."

That wasn't how the Force worked. At least usually. But Rey only asked, "Does Ben have guards?"

"He did. They're dead," Hux said with a snort.

"Those were Snoke's guards," Ben said. He said to Rey, "The ones in the throne room, he means."

She nodded. That made sense – the supreme leader's personal guards. As well, that he hadn't replaced them yet. It had only been a little over a week. "But why not troops, like the ones you're assigning to me?"

"Well," Hux said slowly, "let's be realistic here. If he dies, I will commission a new uniform for myself as the supreme leader and drop you off at the nearest transit center. If you die, he kills me. It makes me very motivated to keep you safe."

"True," Ben said.

"I hope you don't hurt him unless it's actually his fault. Or malice," Rey said to Ben. Rey had a cold feeling that if she passed, Ben would go soon thereafter, just like Luke and Leia.

"I've learned my lesson about gloating about people's deaths, if that matters," Hux said.

Ben nodded, his thoughts somewhere else. From the set of his features, Rey suspected it was the same realization she'd just had – they were linked in the Force. One would not live long without the other. Thank the Maker they'd stopped fighting each other! Quietly, Rey said, "Your mother had enough time to set things right." His eyes shifted to her. There was no surprise or difficulty in catching her meaning that whichever of them died first would be able to avenge the other, should they wish to.

"That was all I had to say," Hux said after a few silent moments passed while the two wallowed in morbid thoughts.

Ben roused himself. "Thank you, Grand Marshal. I'll go forward and be in contact with my staff to set things up. What was the room number?"

Hux gave it to him. Ben nodded, and the three filed out.


	2. Arrival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A/N: You know it's love when a Skywalker offers his girlfriend a pear.

_Day 9_

The  _Finalizer_  was a huge ship, but Rey had spent years in the desert climbing through hulks of similar ships. Even though she had a basic idea of the layout, it was still eye-opening, at times awe-inspiring, to walk through it as they did on their way to her quarters. This time, she was able to see its full glory without being handcuffed.

She worried about leaving marks on the shiny floors and wondered if this was the other side of Finn stomping on the ground, uncomfortable about the way it felt under his boots. Everyone she came across looked at her. She'd never felt so out of place. Their eyes went to her, then to Ben, then away, like he was her passport.

For his part, Ben remained happy. She had worried that the morose tone after contemplating their joined mortality might continue, or that he could choose to be angry about her presence here not being a blanket endorsement. But his mood lifted as they disembarked. He even stopped a few people in the hallway to introduce her – more names, ranks, and sometimes just designations as though he fully expected her to know the difference between faceless stormtrooper FN-1384 and FN-6283. Somehow, he knew. That was interesting.

They were alone after the portage droid dropped off her things and trundled away. The door shut and he turned to her. She had been looking over the room. She didn't know what she'd expected. It was spacious even though it featured the largest bed she'd ever seen. There was a desk large enough to be a table, two chairs, and that was it for furniture. Inset panels and seams showed her there were cabinets or compartments built into the walls, probably for storage for her clothing. There was a refresher less elaborate than the one she'd had on Naboo, but still struck her as luxurious. She understood (or thought she did) what Hux meant about wanting for little on a material basis.

She faced Ben, interrupting the slow circuit his eyes were making up her body. He moved them to her face without any outward sign of guilt, but obviously, with an awareness and respect for her. She smiled. She knew he wanted her. They were no longer standing outside Leia's tomb on the day of her burial. "Come here," Rey said softly. He moved to her immediately, relief on his features.

"I have waited," he said quietly, "and I will wait until-"

"Stop waiting," she told him, sliding her hands around either side of his neck to hook behind it and pull him to her. His breath puffed out in surprise against her cheek. A moment later, he kissed her there, then her mouth, where he lingered while she cupped the back of his head and kissed back passionately. He bent and kissed the corner of her mouth, then under it closer to her chin.

Rey stepped back – the bed was right there – and laid back on it. He followed her down, eyes alight. His lips trailed down her neck to the open area of her tunic. One of his hands, still gloved, touched her hip. She reached down and tugged the glove off, then reached over to do the same for the other as he continued to worship at her chest, working his way down by slow inches.

He was going too slowly. Or so she imagined. What coupling she'd seen on Jakku had always seemed like a frantic thing, impersonal and self-absorbed. This was anything but, yet she still had little other to use as a role model. And she desired, with a deep, unsatisfied yearning. She urged him higher, bringing his mouth back to hers and their hips more into alignment. She hooked one leg around his, her boot heel firm on the back of his thigh. She could feel him hard against her.

His lips pressed into hers more urgently-

And the door buzzer rang. He froze. She froze. He lifted his face an inch, turning it slightly towards the door.

"It's locked, right?" she asked.

"It's security," he said. "They can open it." He got to his feet.

"Would they?" she said disbelievingly, but then again, she had no idea what was normal.

"They'll keep looking for you until they find you and if they don't, they'll tell Hux and then he'll make sure they do find you." Ben looked down at himself. He had an erection and his outfit did not conceal this. Then in a moment, it was gone, the folds of his pants changing. Her brows rose at how odd that was – not so much what he did (although that, too, was strange), but that he was willing to, just putting aside his desire (and hers) when she knew how much he didn't want to. She straightened her clothing.

He glanced back at her, now sitting on the bed a bit flushed but otherwise composed. Then he went to the door as it buzzed a second time. It opened. Two technicians and two stormtroopers awaited. They identified themselves and their intent. Ben made a short sigh and waved them in.

Rey sat through the collection of information and biometric details. It included things she didn't know, like her birthdate and parentage ("Freeborn human, New Republic," Ben had put in and they didn't ask for her parents' identity again), but mostly covered things she did know, like name and basic medical history. They scanned her body for identification, provided her with a security key and data card, then were shown out after Ben assured them Rey would get an orientation later from one of his staff.

"Well," Rey said, "that was … different. Where were we?"

Ben gave her a small, playful smile. "I think I was over here," he said, moving to where she sat on the bed.

Rey leaned back on the mattress. "And I think I was down here."

"Which means," he agreed, "I need to come down there … like this." He put a hand on the mattress next to her head, lowering himself back into the position they'd had before – his feet on the floor, his pelvis to hers, his upper body over hers. She wrapped her leg around his and rolled her hips up against him. It wasn't taking long for either of them to recapture the mood. He kissed her, opening his mouth and turning his head. She put her arms around him, his body solid and warm, pulling him to her until he had to adjust where he was braced on the mattress, dropping to his elbow.

She moaned, pushing up against him. He left her mouth, nipping down to her jawline. She pushed into him again-

The door buzzed. Ben released the bit of her skin that was currently trapped between his teeth. "Hrm," he said, glancing over at the door.

"What is it?"

"I don't sense anything," he said, staring at the door. He pushed himself up slowly, which turned into a strange but graceful sort of lunge off her and to his feet when the door began to cycle. His hand went to the lightsaber he'd clipped back onto his belt shortly after boarding the shuttle. But it was only another portage droid. It whistled a standard greeting and rolled into the room, bearing two packages that it deposited on the table. Then it made an equally standard farewell and let itself out. "Oh," Ben said.

"Those aren't mine," Rey said, sitting up and moving over to see what they were.

Ben came over and examined the packages as well. He opened the first one, revealing inside an assortment of individually wrapped fruit, each one bright, ripe, and succulent. There had to be more than a dozen different kinds.

"Oh, wow," Rey said. "That's … fruit." She didn't know how to express how exotic a simple apple was for someone who had grown up at Niima Outpost of Jakku, eating rations and whatever else she might be lucky enough to barter for.

"There's no note," Ben said, looking through it. "Whose idea was this? Did one of your Resistance friends send a going away gift?"

"No. It was your grand marshal's idea," Rey said with certainty. "I told him I'd spent my whole life on Jakku. He knows what that means."

Ben looked at her for a long moment, then at the fruit. "He must have ordered this last night. After I left to meditate." He opened the other box, which contained an assortment of Naboo delicacies. It was a tourist box – different candies and sweets, but also pickled aquatic edibles, spreads, and crackers. "That's probably when he set up these rooms, as well." Ben picked out a pear, its skin a mixed blush of yellow and red over a green base. He smelled it, then handed it to her.

Rey inhaled the aroma of it as well. It was mouth-watering. She took a bite, to find it was just as good as she'd anticipated. Sweet, luscious juice welled up. The flesh was firm but yielding. "Mmm," she said. He smiled at her and sat next to her on the bed. "This is fabulous," she said. "I don't think I had one of these during any of the meals they served us during the negotiations. There was so much good food there."

"Mm," he echoed, running one finger down and then up the outside of her thigh.

"Try it," she offered it to him.

Instead of taking it from her, he bent in, eyes on her for most of it, then took a bite of it from her hand. "That is good," he agreed.

She smiled at him and laughed because she imagined him to be ridiculously cosmopolitan compared to her. Here she was obsessing over a pear, when she still hadn't had him. She set the fruit aside. "I want to taste you," she told him, turning to kiss him. She pushed him down on the bed, climbing over him. She stopped there, because something had shifted for him.

He looked tense and uneasy, his hands out a little to the sides and with fingers curled. Maybe cosmopolitan, but wounded. After a few seconds, he swallowed and nodded. "Taste me, then."

She leaned down, pressing herself to him, crouched over him like a jockey on a fathier, her knees on either side of his hips. She kissed him for a long, lingering moment, savoring him and the trace flavor of pear that still existed between them. She felt him relax under her, his hands rising to her waist, then sliding down to her hips, then further, curling around her. She kept kissing, eyes shut in bliss-

The door buzzed. She drew in a long breath and lifted her head. Ben looked over at the door.

"Who is it?" Rey had to ask, both frustrated and curious. She needed to learn whatever Force trick he used to sense people on the other side of doors, but for now, she just asked.

"It's Lieutenant Lem," he said after a moment. He looked up at Rey. "She works for me." He huffed.

She remembered Ben talking to Lem on the comm, giving her directions. He'd told her to come to Rey's room to give the orientation and tour. So she was here because she'd been told to be here. Ignoring her … wasn't right, no matter how much Rey wanted to. "Alright." She dismounted. "Let's do that."

"We could ignore it," he offered, but Rey was already off.

"No. This is the third time. This- no. You waited; now I have to."

"Technically," he said, getting to his feet and adjusting his clothing, "We're both waiting now."

She looked up at him, taking his hands briefly and lightly. "We'll have tonight." His smile was slow and accompanied by a blush that Rey turned to admire as she went to the door.


	3. Names

_Day 9_

"Sir. I'm Lieutenant Lem. I've been assigned to help you while you're with us." The woman put on a plastic smile and tried to look friendly. She was at least ten years older than Rey and looked uncomfortable in her own skin. She kept shooting looks over Rey's shoulder at Ben as though checking if she was doing okay.

"No 'sir', please," Rey said. Several beats passed in awkward silence. "Is this something you do often for people?" She was reminded that even Hux had trouble shifting gears to be polite.

"Um," Lem looked at Ben again, then Rey. "No?"

"She's a data analyst," Ben said quietly. "Most of my staff is on the  _Supremacy_. Of the ones who came with me, those with any diplomatic skills went to Naboo. I didn't want to assign one of them because they have meetings already set up to compile insights, then review with Hux and myself tomorrow morning. Hux had his … requirements for who I assigned to you. Lem was the only one who fit."

"Oh," Rey nodded. "No, that's fine. It's fine." The reason for the woman's nerves became clearer. It made Rey more comfortable to know she wasn't the only one who had no idea what she was doing. "What did you say your name was?"

"Lieutenant Lem. Annika Lem."

"What would you like me to call you?"

"Annika?" She looked at Ben again. Rey moved so she was level with Ben, so the woman wasn't looking past her all the time.

"Annika, then."

The woman nodded. "I was named after Anakin Skywalker." She seemed proud of that.

"You were?" Rey looked over at Ben, wondering how common adoration of Darth Vader was in the First Order. But on the other hand, even on the complete backwater that was Jakku, she'd known more than one man named Luke and she was looking at one named after a different Jedi war hero. That the First Order would have people named after their own heroes made sense, but Rey had never thought of it that way.

Ben gave a shy smile. "We've talked about his history a lot, his accomplishments." He glanced at Lem, who finally made the first sign of relaxing.

"Oh," Rey said. She didn't know why it seemed odd to imagine Ben having a normal conversation with someone about a shared interest like that, especially given that he'd obviously styled his appearance similarly, but it was. Speaking of appearances, she looked at Lem's beige outfit. "I haven't seen a uniform like this. Does it mean anything?"

"I'm part of the supreme leader's personal staff. That's what the color signifies. Light grey for technicians, white for technician officers and chief engineers, black or slate for officers of the navy," Lem told her. "The army, the troops, vary by designation but are usually black or white armor. Some individuals are allowed deviations for different reasons, especially among higher echelon troops or specialty units."

"For easy recognition on the battlefield, mostly," Ben said. "Also, for those who aren't concerned about being singled out and fired upon because they look different. It's considered a sign of bravery. It's only allowed in very limited cases."

Rey nodded. "I thought Brumos was part of your staff." Ben nodded. "But he wasn't in this color." Actually, none of the people on Naboo had been dressed in beige.

"The supreme leader's staff have dress uniforms to match the navy. Only the standard uniform is this color. We wanted the appearance of a united front."

She asked Ben, "Do you have a uniform?" She remembered what Hux had said of Ben buying custom clothing.

He nodded. "It's gold with red accents. Snoke's preference. I wore it once."

There was something about the way he said it that told her he'd hated it, and only wore it the one time. She tried to imagine him dressed in something as gaudy as the gold robe Snoke had been wearing. It gave her a new appreciation for Ben's all-black theme. She wondered if the Darth Vader lookalike costume had been a form of rebellion against his new master. She wished she could have seen Snoke's face the first time Ben showed up in an outfit of his own design, quietly daring Snoke to make him go change clothes or let the matter rest. Somehow, that seemed very much like Ben.

"Maybe we should start with the basics?" Lem asked. "For the orientation?"

"Yes," Rey agreed, pulling her thoughts to something less unsettling and yet amusing. "Let's do that."

* * *

"Is there a limit on this?" Rey asked, flipping the shower on and off.

"What sort of limit?" Annika asked.

"I mean, on Naboo, the planet's mostly water anyway so I didn't think it mattered how long I stayed in the shower. But here on the ship," Rey looked to her, "is there a limit to how much I'm allowed to use?"

"No."

Rey tilted her head. "I sense some reservation there."

"Well, if you leave it running, then maintenance droids will be dispatched to see if something is wrong, and being wasteful with resources is … wasteful, but I don't think anyone will say anything to you about it." Annika shot a glance out in the direction of the main room, where presumably Ben was loitering while Annika went over how to operate things in the refresher. "You're the supreme leader's … uh …?"

"Bondmate." Rey said. Lem nodded. Rey thought for a moment, then leaned forward towards the woman. Quietly, she said, "I don't want to be … different. I'm not a princess. I'm not Snoke. Hux told me the supreme leader had just about any privilege he might want. But that's not what I want. I want to see if the Order is something I can be part of. As it is. Not as an outsider." She looked down for a moment, then back up. "Does that make sense?"

"Yes," Annika said. She took on a small smile and the set of her shoulders eased a bit. "Would you like to see the observation decks next?"

"Yes, I'd love to." They walked out the refresher. "Ben, are you coming with us?"

"What did you say?" Lem asked in surprise.

"I asked if he was coming with us," Rey said, not sure why Lem looked uneasy. "I know Hux told him not to, but I think that would be up to Ben."

"B- His name?" Now she sounded scandalized. "The supreme leader?" As though, 'how could you possibly call him that?'

Ben interrupted, "Rey has called me many things. She can use whatever she thinks is accurate."

Creature. Murderous snake. Monster. Those she understood as insulting. But it sounded like Annika at least was putting his original name in the same category, and Ben acted like that was indeed the case. "Why wouldn't I call you Ben Solo?" Rey asked slowly, looking up at him intently. She saw the walls go up, his expression becoming still, like he'd done when Poe had criticized him at the negotiations, but also like he'd done in the elevator on their way to see Snoke, when she'd been trying to convince him to turn. He didn't answer.

"Um," Lem said after a few beats of awkward silence between them, "because it's illegal?"

"Illegal?" Rey turned to her, as Ben was not giving her anything.

"By decree of Supreme Leader Snoke, none are allowed to pronounce Kylo Ren's birth name." Rey's brows rose at that. Lem glanced at Ben. "Unless you've changed that, sir?"

"No." It was a tiny word. He barely moved his lips for it. But it was perfectly understandable.

"Hux pronounced it," Rey said. Even if it had been part of a long string of titles where the context made it clear he wasn't calling Ben that to his face, he'd still said it.

"Uh," Lem said, "the grand marshal is the grand marshal."

"He's also called me stupid, an idiot, and a bunch of other things I don't want to remember." Ben rolled his eyes, trying to make light of it and shake off the defensive quiet he'd momentarily adopted. "I'll answer to you no matter what you use."

Rey turned to him. "What would you like me to call you?" She'd asked Hux and Lem and others, but it had never occurred to her to ask him. She'd already thought she knew all the important things about him, including this, but she'd been wrong.

"The name I chose for myself," he said soberly.

"Kylo Ren," she said carefully, trying to make the mental adjustment.

He nodded once. "Or just Kylo. Ren means 'ruin'. I'm not as attached to it."

"It does?" That came from Lem, who had leapt on that nugget of information right away.

"Yes." He gave her a look like he had only now realized that what he'd said was soon going to be everywhere.

"The Knights of Ruin?" Rey said questioningly.

"After the ruin of the Jedi Academy. Yes. I didn't pick it out. The others did, after some argument."

"So when Hux calls you Ren, he's calling you … destruction, the destroyer?" Rey found that funny.

Kylo shrugged one shoulder. "I think he thinks it's my family name. I suppose it is. They became my family that day. The first who stood by me. No matter what happened with Snoke, I still value that. And now," he said, changing the subject, "I would be pleased to accompany the both of you on the day's tour."

* * *

"Is this area restricted?" Rey asked, looking around the empty space. "Why is there no one here? It's beautiful," she said of the star field, currently streaming by in hyperspace.

Lem shook her head. "You can see the stars out of any view port. It's not as exciting after you've lived here for years, but I thought you'd like to see it, since you … hadn't."

"It's a good place to meditate," Kylo said. "Especially if you're doing something in the Force where you need to reach out. This is where I was for … that captain."

"Oh." Rey walked forward and put her hand on the frame of the largest window into space. She reached out her senses, feeling the movement of their ship, the nature of empty space all around them. The Force existed even here, where matter was scarce and life nearly impossible in the void. She shut her eyes and turned her attention outward, letting it flow across lightyears. She thought of Poe's face, meticulously pulling together the threads of her association with him, the impressions from reading his mind, meeting him for the first time on the  _Falcon_.

There he was, or at least a dim, fuzzed, blurry representation of him, leaning over something that cast a greenish light over his features. He tilted his head, his attention shifting from whatever data he'd been reviewing to something more inward. He'd noticed her, but she didn't think he knew what was happening. Seconds passed. He looked thoughtful, but that was all. "Poe?" she said to him, but he didn't seem to hear her.

He moved a hand to his side dismissively. "No," he said, "something just reminded me of Rey for some reason." She could just barely hear his voice.

"Poe?" she said again, louder, but her voice sounded weak and echoing even to her. He still didn't react. The last time she'd done this, her power and Kylo's had been combined. Kylo was close to her, she realized, closer than he had been a few moments ago. That realization spun the fragile image of her friend off into darkness as she lost the link. She blinked her eyes open. Kylo was standing next to her. Before, he'd been at the back of the room.

"Are you alright?" he asked.

Rey nodded. She assumed she'd spoken Poe's name out loud. As well, Kylo had probably felt her using the Force the same way she'd noticed it at times when he did. "There wasn't anything I wanted to say to him. I just … wanted to know if it worked."

"Did it?"

"Kind of," she said. "I could see him. He sensed me, but he didn't know what was happening. He couldn't hear me."

Kylo brushed the back of his gloved hand against hers. "Do you want him to?"

"It's okay. Let's see the rest of the ship."


	4. Seeds of the Empire

_Day 9_

They went by the medbay so Rey knew where it was, although she found out it was just the nearest medbay. There were more scattered throughout the ship. She was familiarized with the symbology for them, how to read directions and identify corridors, and how to operate internal ship transport systems. Some of this Rey already knew, but Lem covered it and Rey listened anyway, because for every five things that she knew, something she didn't would get tossed in.

Next up was the officer's training area. It was split into several sections, along with separate rooms for different activities – some padded, or with different gravity, for competitive sports or teams, or for using particular kinds of weaponry. There were shooting lanes and aquatic areas. There were simulation rooms with holographic projectors to emulate terrain or opponents. There were practice droids of all kinds.

* * *

"Do you have a favorite?" she asked Annika, referring to the different hand-to-hand weapons. There were so many of them, all kinds, and separate racks for armor and other equipment. Rey was barely keeping herself from drooling.

"No." She looked embarrassed. "I'm a coward," she blurted out. Kylo wandered off, taking a closer look at an enormous polearm of some kind. "I could never …"

Rey blinked at her. "What? No, you're- Why? I don't understand." She remembered the terror Finn had had of the First Order and while it may well have been justified, the fear all by itself struck her now as meaningful. The Order ran on fear, although it manifested differently in different people.

"I mean, I flunked out of reprogramming too many times. So they …" She looked over in Kylo's direction, then back to Rey. "They sent me to Snoke. Back in the beginning." She swallowed, smiled thinly, and shrugged. "And I work with data all day now. Numbers. So … it's not a problem. But I can't fight."

"Do you mean just in training? Have you ever had to fight for what you believed in?"

Lem looked at her with confusion. "What do you mean? I've never been able to get past the simulations, not even thinking about facing someone who might ... I'm not suited for it. They're sure of it." She gestured in Kylo's direction, possibly meaning 'the people who can read my mind are sure of it'. He'd pulled out the weapon and was testing its balance and reach, pretending to ignore them even though Rey knew his attention was very much on them.

"Okay. It's just that," Rey said, "I've only met one other person who thought they were too afraid to fight … and it turned out they weren't. They were from the First Order, too. They just needed to find something worth fighting for."

* * *

"Wow," Rey said. She was having trouble finding words and trying not to boggle at the bodies on display. There was a steady mix of people using equipment and rooms, with a few standing around chatting. None were in uniform unless they were in the changing area. The exercise outfits were more form-fitting than she would have expected, almost more form-fitting than Rey from Jakku the desert planet where most people covered themselves thoroughly could politely handle. She wanted to look away, but everyone else was acting unfazed. Most wore drab colors, but others did not.

"When you exercise, do you do it in here?" she asked Kylo. He'd been hanging in the back for most of their tour, but had moved closer just now. She had no doubt that he could tell she was … taken aback.

"Yes," he answered with an amused look. "Sometimes I use a hangar bay if I'm saber training with a live blade and need space. The trooper's exercise floor is much bigger than this, but it's never empty enough for what I'd need with a live blade. Other times I'll spar with groups there. The  _Supremacy_  has a separate gym and arena for Snoke's guards and the knights. But on a star destroyer, mostly I stick to the officer's area, like this."

"So people see you … doing your thing. Training. Practicing. That's a strange thought, somehow."

"Strange," he said. "I don't think that's what really you're trying to say."

"They're hardly wearing anything," she hissed, being honest. "I've seen advertisements for pleasure palaces that left more to the imagination." He just chuckled. "How it is that Hux is so uptight if this is normal?" she asked.

"Because the body is not sexualized here. Notice how little contact people have. How much space they give each other. How formal, even in here. Touching is reserved for only the most intimate of relationships. It's why all uniforms include gloves."

Rey looked around more carefully, seeing the difference now that Kylo had pointed it out. "Is that why you're so quick to take them off when you're with me?"

"I- Yes. I made that mistake once. I won't make it again."

"What mistake?"

"In Snoke's throne room." His voice was barely audible.

"Oh," she said softly, matching his volume. "I didn't refuse because you'd left your gloves on."

He looked away, then back to her beseechingly. "I don't know why you refused. But I don't want to discuss it in the officer's exercise area."

She chuckled because he was right. This was not the place for a heart-to-heart. Lt. Lem was in earshot if they'd been speaking at a normal level as they had been at first, but she probably couldn't hear them now. Probably. At a conversational level, Rey said, "So you're saying I'm going to see a lot of people, then."

"Yes. You mentioned Hux. Wait until you see the grand marshal doing aerobics."

She shook her head. "That's still a strange thought. Do you dress like … these people when you exercise?"

He blushed this time. "Yes."

"That I'll have to see."

"You don't want me to wear a cowl or something?" he teased.

She whapped him on the arm. He touched her back with a quick swipe and a pat before drawing away.

* * *

"The self-directed study areas are over here," Lem told her.

"No, I want to see this." Rey paused in front of a wide viewing port. It overlooked a bay filled with open-topped rooms they were looking down into. There were children – hundreds of them, some small, only recently having graduated to walking and running; others nearing the cusp of puberty. They were divided into classes by size or age, not only in the spaces below, but also by the bright colors of their tunics. Adults and droids circulated through the areas. To her surprise, not every one of them were human. But the vast majority were and those who were not, were very close to human in form and stature.

Lem stood next to her and for want of something to do, began narrating. "There is also a nursery for infants and a crèche for toddlers. After younglings can perform basic self-care like hygiene and feeding, they come here for educational play and structured learning. When they become subadults, they move into the self-directed curriculum, where they study to gain admission into their future careers."

"Is this all of them?" Rey asked, not looking away. "All the children of these ages on the ship?"

"No. They're divided into shifts. So this is one-third of them."

"Then there are thousands." She thought about those ships Admiral Holdo had struck down over Crait. She thought about the way the  _Supremacy_  had buckled, how Kylo had said things that made her think the life support there may have failed, how Hux's first priority on purchases on Naboo had been medical supplies.

"Yes," Lem said agreeably, not aware of where Rey's thoughts were.

Rey asked, "Did you grow up here? Like this?"

"Like this, yes. But not here. I was on the  _Eclipse_. It was the seed of the First Order, Emperor Palpatine's flagship." She sounded both proud and wistful about it.

Rey finally tore her eyes away from the scene below them. She looked to Lem and something clicked for her. The woman's salt-and-pepper hair was premature. She was older, yes, but not by more than a decade. "You're the same age as the grand marshal, aren't you?" Lem nodded uncertainly. "You were one of the first then, weren't you?"

"Um … yes."

"How was that?"

Lem laughed nervously. There was no humor in it. It was too high and thready. "I can't do combat?"

"Oh?" Then horror. "Oh!" Rey stared at her, realizing what she was saying. The training regime, whatever it was, had … disabled her somehow. "How common was that?"

Lem looked to Kylo, who had come close, but he wasn't looking at Rey. He told her, "Lieutenant, you don't have to tell her anything you don't want to." His voice was as soft as Rey had ever heard it. It was almost enough to distract her from his words, from realizing he was denying Rey something. Not that she minded. If this was where he drew the line, Rey approved whole-heartedly. It reminded her of when he'd cut off the questions directed at Hux about telepathy.

"No sir," Lem said, subdued. "It's not that. I don't remember that time very well. That's probably why I kept failing reprogramming." Her voice lowered further. "It's hard for the programming to stick when you don't remember."

Rey nodded silently and looked back at the children, playing down below. Lem had buckled under whatever pressures she'd been subjected to, shattered into fragments so the mind couldn't comprehend itself – at least for a time. Maybe she'd put herself back together without all the pieces. Rey realized she'd been naïve to think everyone could find their courage as easily as Finn had. The image Rey had seen in the dark shrine on Ach-To came to mind – all the versions of a person, marching through time. One of them remembered, but not the one who was here now.

Just like Rey couldn't remember her parents – only the fact of them – not where she'd been or what they'd looked like, only that Unkar had a dispute with them and they'd died. It was such a pivotal moment, it should have been branded into her head, impossible to think of anything else, but it had been easy for years to imagine someone was coming back for her, maybe even them. She hadn't decided yet if she even wanted to remember more.

The long silence provoked Lem to speak again, nervously. "I think it's much less common than it was back then. The grand marshal has made many changes to his father's programs. They watch people more closely. There are different guidelines. More double-checking. More documentation. Less reprogramming. We hardly ever lose anyone now. No one wants to waste an asset."

"Or a life," Rey said, refusing to consider these people as assets or investments. "How many people are on this ship?" she asked distantly, still looking at the younglings.

"Um." Lem looked to Kylo, who nodded. "Eighty-five thousand at full complement. That includes children and troops. Everyone. I've heard we're at less than that right now, but I don't know the number."

"How many star destroyers like this did you lose in the Battle of Crait?"

Kylo moved between her and Lem, making a gesture to his lieutenant. Lem walked away, giving them privacy. To Rey, he said, "That depends on how you define 'lose'. Nine, at least."

"How many dead?"

"Last I heard, one point nine million, followed by other numbers that keep changing as they find survivors or catalog the dead. I'll get a new report tomorrow when we arrive. More than half were on the  _Supremacy_."

Rey's heart felt too big for her chest, too heavy. It throbbed unpleasantly like it would prefer to stop beating.

As though he were trying to make her feel better about the annihilation, Kylo pointed out, "There were billions on Hosnian Prime alone. I felt their deaths in the Force. There was a ripple both there and near Crait."

"I did, too," Rey said sadly. She sank to the floor, defeated. "How do you deal with that?"

He sat next to her, removing a glove to hold her hand. She smiled wanly at it, understanding his meaning with that action better since he'd explained it in the exercise area. His voice took on the tone of a quote: "'Death is a natural part of life. Rejoice for those around you who transform into the Force. Mourn them, do not. Miss them, do not.'"

She gave a bitter laugh. "Is that some dark side truism? Ignore losing people? Just get over it?"

"No. Darth Vader's writings attributed it to one of the greatest and supposedly wisest of Jedi masters: Yoda."

"A Jedi?"

"Yes. For Vader, that particular saying was a puzzle. One he revisited several times in the journal entries I found. He had many interesting thoughts about it. Some of them have helped me. But … I had no attachment to the people on Hosnian Prime. It was easy to let them go. Less so for those in the First Order. Hardest of all for you."

"Me? I'm not dead."

He smiled briefly. "I know. But you left me. And … it was the first time Vader's, or I suppose Yoda's, words made sense to me. I could miss you. I could mourn you. I could hang onto you with a grip of steel and fire." He shook his head slowly. "But what I needed to do was rejoice that you'd found your way in the Force, that you were following your natural course. To let go of my attachment." He shut his eyes for a moment. "I can't say I succeeded." He opened them. "But I know some of what happened to my grandmother. I knew what would happen if I didn't let go."

"Padme Amidala?"

He nodded. "Someone used the dark side to kill her. Either Anakin in his rage, or Darth Sidious and then Anakin was unable to stop it because he was angry. Because he wouldn't let go. He blamed himself for the rest of his life." He looked down. "But I tell myself, over and over, that I won't make those mistakes." He looked up at her, imploringly. "It's very hard."

Rey hugged him, put her face in his hair and kissed his neck. He stroked her side and then pulled away.

"This is very public," he said quietly.

She nodded. "You're right." She got to her feet. Kylo followed. Rey said, "I'll think on what … Yoda said. And what you've said, that I'm still holding on. I am." She nodded. "I know that."

"I'm glad you're here."

She nodded again. "Yep. Well, let's go check out the rest of the enrichment area."


	5. Enrichment Activities

_Day 9_

"These are the simulation pods," Lem explained as they walked past rows of the self-contained capsules. "You can learn to pilot most of the equipment the First Order fields in these. They have game settings as well that make them very popular. If you want to try, there's usually a sign-up area over here."

"I had one of these," Rey said, brightening, "on Jakku. I salvaged it from one of the ships and set it up with a solar charger. Every day for a few years I would come back at the end of the day and it would run for an hour or so. I must have gone through every program it had, like, ten times." It was a happy memory.

"Oh?" Kylo said, perking up. "You're a pilot?"

"Yes. You didn't know? How do you think I've been getting around?"

He shrugged. "I thought Chewbacca … I don't know. It wasn't something I was paying attention to."

Rey chuckled to herself because, yes, Kylo Ren had had more important things to deal with recently than Rey's transportation choices. She looked back to Lem, who continued the tour. "Over here are standard enrichment modules. You can do a search for anything in the archives that's not restricted. This is where most of the educational programs are. Subadults do all their general training here and sometimes duty-specific courses – they have a curriculum they follow depending on what they want to qualify for.

"Officers, troops, anyone who has free time is welcome to do the same or do advanced learning, or there are entertainment programs – texts, music, drama, fiction, whatever. We have most of the Empire's archives and they had a fairly complete dump from the most popular entries in the Galactic Republic, everything that was normally stored on the capital ships. I'm not saying some place like Coruscant doesn't have more, but you'll find all the classics."

"Some of the history is," Kylo waggled his head back and forth, "not the same as I was taught growing up. Not the same as I saw traveling with my mother, in person, to political events."

"You mean," Rey said, "it's wrong? Propaganda – they're lying."

"Maybe," he said. Lem looked uncomfortable, but was listening. Kylo said, "It's skewed. Some looks intentional, propaganda, like you say, but a lot of the rest just looks like it comes from a very different point of view. The Empire wants order. The Resistance wants freedom. So the same event doesn't mean the same thing. Just be aware of that if you start studying it. I see the same thing sometimes when I compare Jedi and Sith texts."

"Okay. I remember you saying a lot of people knew it was lies."

"Current events, mostly," he said. "I'm a violent usurper who assisted in the murder of my master, set on betraying the entire Order. Or I'm the legitimate supreme leader, embattled by hardliners who want to hold the Order in the past. Maybe they're both true. It depends on who you talk to. There's a rumor Starkiller Base still exists and the Resistance fabricated the story of blowing it up to keep from having to admit they were powerless in the face of our strength."

She looked incredulous. "Seriously? The entire planet is gone. The Order would know that more than anyone."

"It was designed to be moved between stars as it burned them out. The rumor is that it's just in transit right now. Very secret. No transmissions in or out. I don't know how to deal with some of these things. Most of it seems to be what they want to be true, what they hope is true, rather than what they think is the case. The Order's central communications are overseen by High Command in the Unknown Regions. I haven't been there yet."

Rey sighed. "Okay. I don't know how you should deal with it either, but we'll work something out." She looked to Lem. "Back to the tour, I guess?"

"Okay. Let me show you how to use the standard kiosk, then, how to do a search for what you want. Then we can look at the activity areas, demonstration, and practice spaces in case you want to do something hands-on, like droid repair or crafting."

* * *

Rey tinkered with different programs the enrichment center had to offer until it was time for lunch, whereupon she was introduced to the officer's mess hall – huge, noisy, full of food. She gave her identity to the serving droid and was given a square, divided plate that had food on it. There was no selection, no choosing more of one thing and less than another. The food looked synthesized, vaguely similar to rations. Kylo received the same, ending up with larger portions. He was a larger person, so she supposed that made sense, but it still nagged at her sense of fairness.

Fortunately, it tasted better than rations, although it wasn't nearly as delicious as the variety and culinary expertise she'd witnessed on Naboo. The royal caterers knew how to cook, that was certain. The Order food was filling and she didn't find anything objectionable about it aside from the obvious artificiality of it. That seemed a poor thing to complain of after the things she'd had to eat all her life, but maybe that was it – she wanted a change, not a slight upgrade on something she'd associated so deeply with struggling to stay alive.

* * *

"Do the stormtroopers get the same food?" she asked as they sat together at lunch in the bustling hall, Annika to one side with other officers beyond her, chatting amicably amongst themselves.

"Yes," Kylo answered her.

"Does anyone eat anything different?"

"Not publicly," Kylo said. "You could bring outside food in here, but you'd be shamed for it. If you have something different, you'd eat it in your quarters. Like the fruit." Kylo continued, "On the  _Supremacy_ , there is a separate cafeteria for the supreme leader's staff. The food is more varied there. When there's a state visit hosted on-ship, they have customized food. I don't know who prepares it or how. It was never something I was involved in. I suppose I should look into that."

"Will it be different tomorrow, or is it the same every time?"

"Both," Kylo said. "There's a limited selection, but they rotate it so the flavors vary. Breakfast usually tastes best."

"Why is that?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. Personal preference. Some people prefer dinner or lunch or have favorite choices. I prefer breakfast. Do you prefer one meal time or another?"

"Dinner. That was usually the only meal I had. I'd turn in my parts for the day, take the portions back and eat. If there was more than I could eat that night, I'd finish it the next morning. Then back to work."

"What happened if you were sick or hurt and couldn't collect parts?"

"I had a few things I'd set back just in case, so I didn't starve. But you couldn't not work. What happens here?"

"You go to the medbay, get fixed, and go back to work. So I suppose it's the same."

She nodded. "Something I want to ask, about all these introductions you keep making – names, ranks, even designations. It's too much for me to keep track of yet, but the designations … How do you know who is who among the troopers?"

He blinked at her, as though she'd asked him how he told Lt. Lem from Commander Adar. "Um … they're different. All the stormtroopers are different. Under the masks. They're not clones."

She shook her head. "No, I know that. Yes," she laughed, realizing he must have thought she didn't and maybe she thought they all looked like Finn. "You know who they are without seeing their faces. Wait!" She realized something. "You know who they are through closed doors, where you see nothing at all. There's nothing on their armor you're recognizing. It's something else, through the Force."

"Ah." He straightened. "Now I understand what you're asking. Yes. I'm using a Force power. But there's also a serial number right about here." He pointed near his collarbone.

"Okay," she said uncertainly. "I saw that. It's very small. I can't read it until I'm right next to them."

He nodded. "It's not supposed to be distinctive. They're supposed to look identical to casual review."

"Why is that?"

"I don't know. Unit cohesion? Ask Hux. Or Phasma. Someone else."

Rey laughed a little. "So, back to what you're doing with the Force. Can you teach me that?"

"Of course. It's similar to mind-reading. The power fits in the same category, but you're only perceiving them, like I had you do with Poe."

She nodded slowly, thinking back to that. "Where you had me sense him. Just get an awareness of him there, in the Force. That's why you didn't detect the portage droid earlier."

He nodded. "And when I was wearing the mask. Seeing the world with your eyes can interfere sometimes. I wanted to see things as they truly were."

"Did it help?"

He shrugged.

"But then how do you keep track of how many people you know? You just rattle off names like I do …" She stopped and thought about what she'd been about to say. Then she finished, "parts. Like I do with ship components and what they're worth."

She leaned back, eyes distant as she mentally took apart that star destroyer on Jakku and then this one she was in, thinking through all the sectors and piping, vents, superstructure, wiring, all of it. She knew the name of most every component, along with where to find it (assuming someone else hadn't stripped it out first) and what the going rate was for it at Niima Outpost. She focused on him. "Okay, never mind. I know how to do that one. But I've been doing it for so long, I didn't realize that was a trick of the Force."

"When I left … Luke … I realized how little he'd taught me. Mostly, he was there while I taught myself. It's similar to how the First Order approaches training. Younglings have structure, but beyond a certain point, they dispense with teachers altogether. Did you notice that?"

Rey tilted her head. "I didn't think about it at the time, but you're right."

"You've already learned a lot." He chewed his lips. "It was presumptuous of me to offer to teach you. I just … wanted to make you stay. Now I want to learn together with you."

"We've already been learning together." Rey reached out and took his hand. She didn't wait for him to take the glove off. He looked from it to her, then turned his hand and gave her a squeeze in return.

* * *

The afternoon took her to the hangars, where she ended up getting an impromptu review of most of the Finalizer's mobile armament and craft. Here, Lem was mostly sidelined. She knew little about ships and the idea of being in a cockpit, facing down someone else's laser canons, wasn't one she could stomach. Kylo knew a lot, though. And Rey, who knew them inside and out, had opinions about them. They talked excitedly until it was time for dinner.

* * *

"So this is what you do?" Rey asked Lem over dinner. Kylo had been called away for something to do with the  _Supremacy_  and ship assignments. It sounded unappealing to Rey and exactly the sort of thing Poe would want her to take notes on. At least for now, she thought it better that she not know some things. In case something happened, she didn't want there to be any suspicion that she might have told anyone anything. She went on to the lieutenant, "Work, train, eat, sleep?"

"Well, no, there is a social life. People have interests. Gossip about the officers is very popular, but very dangerous, which is probably why it's popular. Fabricated dramas involving historical figures are all the rage right now. Large scale competitive team sports used to be a big deal, but they caused a riot and a fire on the  _Relentless_  with some AT-ATs destroyed, so they're banned now."

"A riot, on a ship, because of … a sport?"

"Um, yeah. Like I said, it was a big deal for a while. All the news. It's ironic, but we're really divided on how divisive that was, and if it was a good thing or not, and if the ban should be rescinded. Sometimes, I think we make up stuff to argue about." She seemed lost in thought for a moment, then said, "Some people research things and try to advance science or weaponry. And there's art, music, that sort of thing."

"Hm," Rey said, checking out the protein patty that was part of her dinner. It tasted better than it looked. "What are you into?"

"Ah," Lem colored. "Um, Wig Wars."

"What?"

"Wig Wars?" Lem said hopefully. "Um, yeah, it's sort of a First Order thing."

"What is it? A hairstyling competition?" Lem's hair was straight and simple in a regulation cut. Just about everyone's was.

"No, no, nothing like that." Lem shook her head. "It started as a propo – a propaganda piece – just a comedy about the Senate of the Galactic Republic and how corrupt it was in the last days. But they set it up where people could join a network, make their own character, and argue with the established ones. So … it sort of took off from there. It's been going on for years and it's a really big deal now that we can't have large-scale organized sports.

"There are hundreds of main characters – all the slots are filled – and so there's a lot of jockeying between followers to try to bring down other characters and let one of them take the slot, plus people introduce legislation, some of it ridiculous, and everyone bickers over it like it's serious. There are tens of thousands, maybe more, of followers, spread out across the First Order. Communications get kind of boggy in wartime, but it's still fun when the system is up and running."

"It's not real, right?" Rey asked.

"No, of course not. It's a drama, soap opera. Sort of. Role play. There are scandals and affairs and blackmail and the more outrageous sometimes the better, because you're always trying to win over more followers, who will only follow you if you're popular. And some people follow senators that are funny and others follow ones that are serious or sexy or simply nice to people. There's a huge public relations component to it, because followers can switch who they support at any time. If a senator loses too much support, they get a vote of no confidence and their slot is up for election. There are always, always shenanigans going on.

"Plus, no one knows for sure who's playing who, so there are rumors sometimes that different upper level people in the First Order might be behind a character who's flamboyant or witty or silly. And the Office is Truth still has their hand in, because they set it up to start with. They front Senator Palpatine, which is incredible! You can't imagine. He's so serious on the face of it, dignified and everything, but it's absolutely shocking when you see how many plots and schemes he's behind. He's always stirring the pot."

"That's, uh," Rey said, "interesting. It's like an entertainment show?"

"Yes, except essentially put on by … us. The Order. It's just for fun. That's what you were asking about, right?" Rey nodded. Lem said, "I mean, we can't talk about each other too much or you get censored or written up for disrespect. I get notifications of what's happened in Wig Wars every night."

"Is Kylo into that?"

"Um, I don't think so, but I wouldn't know for sure. I kind of doubt it. It's mostly a thing in the officer levels and, um, I know he's like leader now, but he didn't used to be. The Knights of Ren are different. They've always been separate. Obviously, you have to be in the system on a daily basis. I know Snoke wasn't. I'm sure of that – I handled information systems for him too often to think otherwise. But that didn't keep it from being a rumor – probably one of the ones Palpatine started."

"How do you deal with so many rumors, or the propaganda, and never quite knowing the truth? Isn't that confusing?"

Lem blinked at her. "Oh no. It's never confusing. Orders are clear. Do what you're told. That's all it boils down to. Everything else, just thinking about it – that's fantasy, like Wig Wars. I mean, it's fun, but who would really get too involved in that besides just enjoying it? If you start acting on it, then you're piloting AT-ATs across the hangar bay of the  _Relentless,_  shooting at walkers because your sports team lost the big final. Then you're no better than the rebels."

"No better than the rebels?" Rey was confused. "But what you're saying is the First Order did that. There was a riot because a team lost. They acted on it."

"Well, yeah" Lem said. "But they shouldn't have! The rebels are always doing things because of their ideals. For individual reasons. Whatever upset them recently. The Order is about structure. We all move as one. Together. We're part of the same team, or at least we're supposed to be, and that's why large-scale sports were banned." The lieutenant seemed to think about it for a moment, then she said, "Okay, so it's kind of inconsistent. I see what you're saying. But at least we know better."

"Do you really think the rebels don't?" Rey asked with some heat to her tone.

Lem blinked at her a few times. "I don't know what the rebels know. How would I? I just know they shoot at us and blew up Starkiller and stuff. There are people gone and ships destroyed. That's not propaganda or a rumor. That's the truth. I trust my leaders. What else am I supposed to do?" Genuine anxiety crept in around the edges.

"You're right," Rey said slowly. "That is true. And they're the ones you have to trust."

"I do what I'm told," Lem said almost sulkily. "That's my job. I'm not a rebel."

"Right. I wasn't- It's okay. You've done a good job today." Rey wasn't sure what else to say. "Tomorrow we get to the  _Supremacy_?" she said, trying to change the subject.

Lem accepted the change with a nod. "That's what I heard this morning. That's the last I had news."

The rest of the meal was in tense silence. Later, when they reached the hallway her rooms were on, there were two stormtroopers loitering outside her door. They came to attention as soon as they saw them. Rey felt over their presence in the Force as she approached, noticing Kylo was right – she could feel who they were now that she was looking for it. It wasn't a name or designation, just a sense of their identity as clearly as though she were looking at their faces. She didn't need their helmets off to do it. It was a neat trick.

One swiveled her head towards Rey and said, "Sir. Supreme Leader sends his regards. Says to tell you he has been delayed and will join you later this evening."

"You checked in with him first?" Rey asked.

"Yes sir. We are here by his orders and will remain all night."

Rey thought about correcting them as she had Lem – to be Rey and only Rey, without any honorific, but then she'd be correcting thousands of troopers, reinforcing that she was different – that she was a rebel, that she wasn't on their team. She understood that now better than she had that morning. She turned to Lt. Lem and nodded. "Thank you for everything you told me today. I'll see you tomorrow, then. Not too early." She went in her room, grateful for the solitude she would have while waiting for Kylo to return. She had a lot to think about.


	6. Always Scheming

**A/N: How did Phasma survive? Beats hell out of me. I never figured out how she survived The Force Awakens, but obviously she did. Falling down a few decks, through fire, on a ship with inconsistent gravity as we saw in The Last Jedi doesn't strike me as automatically fatal for a primary, named character. But mainly, Hux likes her and I think they have a good dynamic, so I kept her alive for this fic.**

_Day 9_

"How was Naboo?" Captain Phasma asked. She and Hux were seated in the noisy officer's mess hall, teeming with others taking lunch at the same time. It was the first time she'd managed to have meaningful face time with the recently-promoted grand marshal since before the Battle of Crait.

He sat across from her. They'd already been sitting together for a few minutes, silently, but this was their norm. Neither of them was disposed to be chatty, which meant they enjoyed one another's company. Eventually, he answered, "Humid." He thought about how else to succinctly describe the trip. He liked rhetorical triptychs. They were well-organized and balanced, unlike some overly simplistic duality. "Nerve-racking. Bowel-loosening. Although the last was not due to the second."

Phasma nodded. She would have never offered him the insult that combat or social stress of any kind would frighten him so much as to manifest in poor digestion. She continued eating in a leisurely manner as she reflected on his words.

He elaborated. "So much of their food has a shell or is blubbery. By the last day, I'd learned my lesson and confined myself to obvious vegetables and grains. By that point, I had shown the required diplomacy and didn't have to try things for the pretense of respect."

She nodded again. Off-ship food was unpredictable. Naboo was a water planet in more ways than one. It would be a nice place to stage aquatic practice maneuvers. She'd had to review their underwater capabilities in the very limited lead time he'd given her before they arrived there. But as it turned out, there had been no hostilities, so none of her preparations had been called into action.

They sat together for another minute or two of silence, eating slowly while chatter went on around them.

Hux said, "I had expected our conversation would revolve around taxes, tribute, and trade – money, effectively. They weren't interested in that at all. Instead, it was amnesty, justice, and the abolition of slavery." He ate a little more, then took a measured sip of his tea, grimacing at it. "Even though those are all very philosophical, I suppose I could reduce them to the issue of life. Liberty, perhaps. It's a higher survival priority than money or resources. In that view, it's sensible."

She nodded thoughtfully, beginning to work on the last component of her lunch, a sweetened starch pudding.

"For the amnesty issue, it was Ren mainly insisting they give up their ideas of prosecuting us for having won the war and the manner in which we did it. They saw reason on that. Their idea of justice and ours will require a great deal of work. I'll need to sit with the High Command to properly draft our proposal for the new government. The New Republic will do the same. I'm certain they will be wildly different. And as for slavery …"

He took another sip of tea, followed by a drink of water, which he also had on his tray as a beverage. "They want us to give up child recruitment and instead take their voluntary members at an older age, when it's more difficult to instill group loyalty, dedication, and enthusiasm." He set aside his empty food tray. "What are your thoughts on that?"

She didn't answer right away, finishing off her lunch first. He wasn't in a hurry either, nursing his tea in small sips alternating with drinks of water. Either the taurine must be too bitter today or the trip to Naboo had skewed his taste enough that taking it straight was unpalatable. She assumed the latter, since First Order food was very consistent in flavor and nutrition. Phasma wondered if that would be a permanent change for him? "Propo," she answered.

"Hm. Yes." Hux rubbed at his mouth and chin. They sat together, meals finished, looking off into the distance. "On both sides," he said after some time. "That's very insightful." He contemplated it more. "Discipline, though," he said in a lamentful tone.

She nodded sympathetically, because she understood he meant that even with altering and enhancing their propaganda, programming, and mental conditioning to account for older recruits, they'd still have increased issues with maintaining discipline, obedience, and unit cohesion. They needed to consider how difficult it would be to deal with that before responding to the request for a change. She said, "I will prepare a report for you on the rates of field reprogramming by entry age. We know that psychological disintegration and identity issues are more common with multiple backgrounds."

The grand marshal cast his eye towards the entrance, where Kylo Ren and his paramour (er, 'bondmate') had just come in with one of his lieutenants, probably the escort Hux had suggested. From this distance and with all the chatter in between, there was no way to overhear them. The supreme leader was gesturing around, eyes on her most of the time, then introducing her to a few people closest to them. "Very true," Hux said to Phasma. "Inconsistency in background makes a person unpredictable, even to themselves, especially when that break in continuity comes with a sense of betrayal or rejection. A person can endure a great deal when it is normalized. It's only during those times of transition that the self fractures."

Phasma's line of sight followed his. When Hux looked back to her, she raised her brows slightly. She'd been the one to arrange his father's death at his order. He knew what she was asking. He gave his head a slight, but deliberate, negative shake. "Let's leave that alone for now. He's had, what? A week? I think I can work with this."

She didn't drop it immediately. Instead, her brows still up, she put two fingers on the table, splayed apart but unmistakable. It wasn't just Kylo Ren. It was this Force user he'd brought with him, named Rey from what Phasma had been told. Phasma knew she couldn't trust Hux's words or even thoughts to indicate what he really wanted. He had to trust her and he  _did_  to look out for his best interests, even though there'd been precious little either of them could have done against Snoke.

It wasn't the same for Kylo Ren. The main reason Ren hadn't been eliminated immediately was due to timing. Phasma's recovery from injuries on the  _Supremacy_  had taken more than a day in bacta. By the time she was out of medbay, Hux was in his quarters on a three-shift recovery cycle from stimulant abuse and lack of sleep. Almost as soon as he woke, she heard he was promoted to grand marshal. While it was as good a time as any to strike, the promotion gave her pause. She wanted confirmation before doing anything rash. She assumed Hux would seek her out if he wanted her to act, indicating his intentions with his presence.

But there had been nothing. She was also completely absorbed reorganizing their decimated troops and directing her share of the recovery operations. She heard of no problems or misbehavior coming from the supreme leader and detected no overt friction between himself and his grand marshal. Hux's daily directives and commentary to her through the comm system was normal given the continuing recovery process. Her reports back to him were the same. The lack of signal was a signal and she knew it. Ren lived.

And here they were. He looked at her fingers and shook his head again. "Wait," he said very softly so she read his lips more than hearing him. Just loud enough for her to hear, he said, "I'll schedule you in for staff training with her. She had one with her belongings. I value your opinion."

Then he went back to the previous topic at a normal volume. "We should pay special attention to the recruitment process then, with a smooth transition to subvert loyalty to home into loyalty to the Order. Subversion rather than replacement." He nodded. "What you said earlier: propo. That is indeed the heart of it." He nodded his head back in the direction of the supreme leader and his consort-to-be. "For them, just the same."


	7. Enemies to Lovers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Explicit. At the very end, there is oblique mention of Kylo Ren having gone through abuse as a result of Snoke.

_Day 9_

She was sitting cross-legged on her bed when she felt him. She'd had her senses open, just taking in the ship and all the tens of thousands of sentient life forms aboard it. She'd daydreamed long hours on Jakku about the wrecks, wondering what the huge  _Ravager_  or the other ships had looked like in their prime, when they were new and pristine and fully manned. Now she knew, while also knowing she'd seen less than a tenth of it. She was starting to see how someone could feel at home here.

The door buzzed. "Come in," she called, knowing it was him. He stood between the guards in front of the door. She could feel the Force bond glimmer on the edge of activation as she sharpened her awareness on him. Before it could open, the doors slid apart and he walked in. She blinked away the meditative trance, preferring the reality.

They smiled to see one another. He turned and locked the door, though she knew that was mostly symbolic. Should someone really want to get inside, the guards would slow them more than the lock. He shrugged out of his cape and hung it over the back of one of the chairs.

"How was your meeting?" she asked.

"Tiring. Or maybe it was just knowing you were near and I wasn't with you."

She smiled at how persistently romantic he was. It was sweet. "More likely," she said, "it's because you've been awake for two days."

"I have?" He looked confused as he thought back. "No, I meditated for some of that."

"In the cold and wet, on stone. That doesn't count. You did sleep the night before, didn't you?"

"Yes, I did. I think." He huffed, pulling off his gloves and setting them on the table. "I will sleep tonight. It's been a better day than most in the last couple weeks. It was nice being with you today." He ran a hand through his hair, tousling it. "It is likely to be this way with me for a very long time – busy. These problems will not resolve easily." He smiled. "And Hux said he wouldn't accept my resignation."

Rey grinned at that. "I would expect no less of the son of Leia Organa, or the grandson of Padme Amidala, than for you to give everything you have for your people."

He gave a single slow nod. "That is flattering. Thank you." He moved to the edge of the bed. "I want you to be one of my people as well," he said softly. "I notice … you are not." His tone turned cautious and questioning. "What do you want me to make of that?"

"Last week, I told Finn that my loyalty shouldn't be questioned unless I were on the First Order flagship and wasn't with the Resistance anymore." She gestured at her surroundings. "And here I am. I'm learning how to be one of your people and what that means. Already, it doesn't mean what I thought it meant."

He reached out slowly and touched her cheek. "Let me know when you make a decision. Take all the time you need."

Rey opened her mouth to speak, then shut it. She pursed her lips. "In the First Order … Hux called me a paramour. You said that sounded illicit. He set up separate quarters for us and had you assign me, like, a handmaiden. I mean, I know that's not what Lem is, but it looks like that. And … I just don't know – what's normal here? Are we doing anything … improper?"

"No. Not in that sense. There are no limits placed on the behavior of the supreme leader. I could feed one of my captains feet-first into the grinder that was in Snoke's throne room without censure. No one will dare to speak about who I have in my bed."

She blanched. "That happened – the grinder." She remembered the thing from the battle they'd had with the guards.

"My executions have been less gruesome. But Snoke had it there for a purpose, yes. I'd seen it in action before. Fraternizing with the enemy is the bigger sin, considering that some in the High Command disagree with my title. Although I'm sure if I fed a few to the grinder, the objections would cease. It is precisely my differences from my predecessor that weigh against me here."

"I see," she said, looking up at him. She noted he was saying he'd ordered, and probably personally carried out, executions. She wasn't sure how she felt about that, but she was sure it wasn't something he'd done lightly. She knew of nothing in his life that hadn't been without careful consideration and sometimes years of trying to find a better solution than the one he ended up with. He was standing quietly next to the bed, his hands at his sides, watching her. "I'm glad you're different," she told him.

He smiled, the skin around his eyes crinkling. "You would not grace my presence if I were not."

She moved to the edge of the bed, adjusting so her legs were on either side of his. She reached out for his belt, glancing up at him. "How does this unfasten?"

His voice deepened slightly. "There's a clasp here." He gestured, but then hooked his fingers under the belt on the same side as his lightsaber. She opened the clasp and released it, letting the belt sag into his hand. The lightsaber made that side the heaviest. He reached back and set the belt and attached saber on the desk.

When he turned back, he started to unfasten the top of his tunic, but Rey put her hands on his forearms to stop him. "No, let me." He was too tall for her to do it while sitting on the bed unless she stretched her arms up awkwardly. "Come here where I can reach you." He leaned in while she scooted back fully on the bed. He climbed over her, holding himself up with his arms. It put his chest in easy reach of her hands. She made quick work of the clasps.

She worked the garment off him one arm at a time as he stole kisses between the motions, laying them on whatever part of her face he could get to. She giggled. She tossed the jacket in the direction of the floor, leaving him in his undershirt. He propped himself on his elbows and continued with kissing, but more directed now.

She curled her arms around him, then her legs just to see what it felt like. He was hard and starting to nip at her cheek, then her jawline, his breath puffing at her skin. She pressed at the waistband of his pants, then reached all across the front. The clasp was not there. She checked one hip, then the other, by now truly distracted by how to get into this guy's pants.

Kylo cleared his throat and reached behind him on one side, unhooking a panel that unwrapped around him from the hips up, then separated into a seam in the front over the groin. She made a mental note to take a closer look at that later on. He lifted away and leaned down to free his feet from his boots and remove the last of his garments. In the meantime, she had her own clothes to be rid of, but she knew how to do that on her own.

When she finished, she moved to the center of the bed. He stood up from taking off his boots and started to move, then stopped at her gesture.

"I want to look at you. All of it." He was muscled and hard and scarred over. The marks she'd left on his body weren't the first. There were others all across him. He was marked like a veteran of many battles, but he was not an old man. The First Order's medical prowess had reduced everything to mere purplish or white lines on his skin, but they were still there, signs that he'd fought all the way to where he stood today.

She met his eyes. They were dark, sad, hopeful, and very focused on her. He asked, "You are … not disappointed?"

"No. I will never be, not with you. Come to me?"

And he did.

She pulled him to her and then rolled them both so she could climb on top, riding him and rubbing herself against him. He rose up to cup a breast with one hand, the other supporting him, as he eagerly applied kisses. She didn't want to do this like she'd seen on Jakku, in a hurry in stolen moments, but her passion was rising fast, energy starting to zing between them. It felt like they'd waited forever for this. In the moment, she found herself unwilling to wait any longer. She pushed him flat, kissing him fiercely. He answered with a desperate energy. She pressed herself back against him, feeling him nudge against her.

It took more maneuvering than she'd expected to figure it out, but when they did, it was glorious. She pushed back on him and it gave her such a raw, open feeling. She let him inside of her, enveloped him, and become one as their spirits intertwined. She rocked up and down, feeling him shift inside of her, his hips matching her motions for a few moments.

Then he was gasping, his hands on her hips. His voice stuttered, whatever he was trying to say, lost. But she was coming already – a throbbing inside of her made unfamiliar by the feeling of his hard shaft within her body. She fell forward, her arms catching herself on either side of him as she panted. Her body flushed – light, pleasure, and ecstasy danced through her veins. His hands slid up to her waist as he heaved a long, gentle, "Oh."

Breathing harder than she would have expected for so little, she looked up at him. "I thought it usually took longer than that." Even for Jakku, that was quick.

"I think it does," he said, similarly blown. "I've never …"

"You've never?"

"Uh … no."

She began to laugh, which felt absolutely bizarre with him still in her. She moved to the side and up, which engendered an even stranger sensation as he pulled out of her. "Oh! That's …" She looked down, but all seemed well.

He petted her side in concern. "Nothing's wrong?"

"No, no. I thought," she turned to him with a smile. "I thought you were the sophisticated one! You've been to all these places. You live in a starship just crawling with people, human people who are good-looking! You've been able to use Jedi mind tricks for, I don't know, a decade? And most of that you've been on the dark side using mind-reading and stuff? I just assumed …" She shook her head.

His brows pulled together in hurt. "You assumed I'd been using the Force to …?"

"No, I mean … No, you're right. That's a terrible thing to imply and I'm sorry I did. It's just that I know you  _could_ , not that I could imagine you doing it."

He let out a breath. "Okay, that's good. And no, I never. Ever. Used the Force that way."

"I assumed that somewhere along the line you'd been with someone … however it happened."

"No." Then he repeated himself, his eyes far away. "No."

"Kylo?" Somehow she sensed he wasn't answering her question, but instead refusing something. Or trying to.

"No," he said again.

"Okay." She put her hand on his chest. His heart was pounding. "It's okay."

He flinched and then put his hand over hers. His words came quick, half-panicked. "Why do you think he wanted me to kill you? I was interested in you. He knew it. No one – I couldn't be interested in anyone. Not like that. No friends. No loyalty before him. Not … my parents. Not the knights. Not anyone." He swallowed roughly and looked up at her.

"You had said it was sexual sometimes, so I-"

He made short, rapid shakes of his head. "Not with other people. There were never other people. I would have fought that. He knew it. Please, Rey, know that I would have fought that?" She nodded to him. He went on, "But he'd threaten. And I'd … but until you. That wasn't a threat with you. He meant it."

"You're right," she said quietly. She dismounted, sitting at his side. "That wasn't a threat. He meant to have you kill me."

"I know. And I didn't. He's gone. It's all gone. I ended it." He breathed out as though trying to exorcise the demons. He swallowed. "This didn't go well. Because of me." He looked up at her apprehensively. "I shouldn't have mentioned any of that?" He was still watching her and being guarded, as though waiting for the other shoe to drop.

She gathered him into her arms and kissed his forehead. She waited with her lips on his skin until he relaxed and leaned into her, breathing deeper. She petted his messy hair. "You've been awake for days. You've nearly died of wounds. Snoke, Leia, Luke, Han, supreme leader, and me. All of these things have happened in the last two weeks, and yet," her voice conveyed the smile on her face because he wasn't where he could see it, "you're worried you said the wrong thing by admitting it has effected you? You are the person I want to be with, Kylo. I couldn't be prouder of everything you are."

"Thank you for coming with me," he murmured brokenly. "You're everything to me."

"Let's get under the covers," she whispered. He nodded silently.


	8. Rumor Mill

_Day 10_

"It has been said," Captain Peavey said uneasily, "that you spent some time with the Resistance general while on Naboo."

"My," Hux said dryly, "the rumor mill certainly grinds quickly. Yes. I did." He'd been expecting some tittering among the juvenile and weak-minded, but he never would have expected Edrison Peavey, years his senior and who ought to know better, to ask him about it point blank after the morning staff meeting, after the rest had filed out of the room. It was demeaning.

Peavey looked at him more appraisingly than usual, as though judging him, or trying to. Finally, he asked gruffly, "It was … approved?"

"Yes," Hux said irritably, "it was approved. You will be pleased to know my permission slip was properly stamped by the supreme leader, who knew all about it both before and after. I did nothing wrong, against the code of conduct, or immoral."

"I wasn't implying …" Peavey shifted his weight uncomfortably. He looked as uninterested as he should have about the subject, which begged the question of why he'd asked about it at all.

"Then what were you implying?" Hux said angrily. "I either fucked the Resistance in the ass or else I was confident enough in my own superiority to allow him to service me. It's one or the other," he sneered. Even though both options he presented were false, they were graphic enough, he hoped, to shame Peavey into keeping his mouth shut. "Do you have further impertinent questions about my off-duty behavior?"

"No sir." The man's expression was stony and wary now, not embarrassed as it should have been for this sort of personal, inappropriate topic.

"I think less of you for even asking," Hux said, but his voice was level rather than accusing. Something was off here. It was confirmed by Peavey looking resentful rather than ashamed, and this made Hux pay close attention to the man's next words.

Peavey muttered, "With the new supreme leader …" and looked off to the side.

"Ah." Hux's brows shot up. He understood, all in a rush. "You think he whored out his own grand marshal?" A wide grin spread over Hux's features, because it was an astonishing idea, hilarious even if sickeningly possible.

Snoke could certainly have done such a thing. It was more than rumored, almost well-known, that a few of those who had been stupid enough to actively plot against him had suffered ignominious fates because of it. Really, all you needed was a lecherous, pleased chuckle from Snoke in relation to someone abruptly removed from their position and shipped away in chains to have an inkling of what might have happened to them.

Peavey looked at the floor, at Hux's shoes. "It did not seem in character for you, sir."

"It wasn't," Hux snapped, fixing his expression for a moment to make sure Peavey knew he wasn't joking. "It's not the sort of thing I've ever done or am likely to do again. But it wasn't Ren's idea. He didn't arrange it. It was of my own free will, strange as that may sound." He laughed again, unable to keep himself from it. "I am delighted that you worried about me. Thank you for explaining yourself. If you ever find me hacked to pieces with a lightsaber, you can lay that at Ren's feet, but otherwise, he's been the most accommodating commander I've yet had."

Peavey was silent for a long moment, thinking that over. "Truly?" he finally said.

"Truly." After a pause, Hux added, "Have I had any others where I was ever free to enjoy myself in the least, off-duty or otherwise?"

Peavey was quiet again. Then, "No sir."

"There you have it. I had a pleasant time. That's all there was to it."

"Yes sir." Peavey collected his things. "We needed to know," he said quietly, as though that made any difference in what they were discussing.

"Yes," Hux nodded, noting the plural. He remembered Ren's comment about Peavey's loyalties being to Hux, not Ren. It was thrilling to know they cared, but problematic. Personal loyalty was dangerous and discouraged, but Hux wasn't about to discourage it if it was directed at  _him_. "I suppose you do. Things are different now. Anything further?" Peavey shook his head. "Dismissed then."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because I've had a question about sexuality and the First Order come up, I want to be clear that the reason why Hux is uptight about this is fraternizing with the enemy - not homosexuality. The appearance of submitting, being used sexually, having been whored out, etc. **to the enemy** is the issue. Doing it with another Order member might introduce issues of code of conduct violation due to rank, but again, the behavior itself isn't the problem. As Kylo brings up when Rey asks about it, it's the fraternization that's the sin here.
> 
> This is also why Hux would require the supreme leader's authorization to enjoy himself with Poe. Also part of why Kylo was so intensely amused when Hux didn't ask permission for the ice cream date at Poe's place. Hux could presume the first authorization would cover multiple meetings, but he would be presuming. Fortunately, Kylo was cool with it.


	9. Morning News

_Day 10_

"What was that?" Rey lifted her head, roused out of slumber by a noise. Something had dinged. She looked around the spacious but Spartan room, remembering where she was: the  _Finalizer_ , in the officer-level room provided to her by the First Order, with Kylo Ren wrapped around her like he would never let go. With that setting, the identity of the sound became clear.

"Yes?" she called out. Next to her, Kylo grunted, coming awake. His fingers fumbled against her skin. They were both still nude. "Comm open. Yes?" Rey repeated, this time with the right words to signal the communication line to open.

Hux's droll voice rolled out of the speaker. "Sorry to bother you, but the supreme leader is not in his quarters. If you see him, please tell him that although I handled the morning staff meeting in his absence, I would greatly appreciate his attendance at the final planning meeting, for our pending exit from hyperspace later today. It's not critical, but it is important and if he does not, I will have to rearrange my schedule to do it instead."

"I'll be there," Kylo growled threateningly.

She could hear the smile in Hux's voice. "Thank you, sir. Hux out." There was the lower-pitched sound of the comm closing.

Kylo rolled over and groaned as he stretched. "My alarms are all set back in my rooms. Not here." He sighed. "Well, at least Hux handled the one."

"You needed the rest. I'm glad you're comfortable around me," she said. He looked at her and smiled dreamily. She asked, "Sleep well?"

"Mm-hm," he nodded, still adoring her with his eyes.

"So what happens at this planning meeting?"

He sighed, reluctantly changing gears. "We lay out what we're going to do over the next day at the wreck of the  _Supremacy_. We've already decided it, in broad strokes, but the different commanders will be reporting on what they'll need to get their assignments done, their timelines, and that sort of thing. We have to make sure they don't conflict or double-book the same resources. I say 'we', but Hux isn't in that one, unless he has to cover for me. The  _Supremacy_  is my project."

"What about all the people who were on the  _Supremacy_?"

"They're still there. I hope."

"Is it … are they okay?"

"They should be." He sat up and swung his feet over the edge of the bed. He looked at the wall near the top of the bed, then leaned over and tapped an almost invisible control panel. Numbers lit up. He grunted again as he studied the clock. "I have enough time for a shower." He turned back to her. They kissed gently and tenderly.

"You're going to be busy all day today, aren't you?" she asked when they parted.

"Uh-huh," he nodded, backing off the bed. "But I'm so glad you're here. I'll be thinking of you the whole time."

"Think of your work. That's what you need to be thinking of. I'll be fine. Can we catch meals together?" She watched his butt as he went in the refresher. She couldn't wait to see him work out. Maybe they could do saber training together sometime.

"Um, I think so. After the planning meeting, I'll be doing the Naboo review. I'll have lunch after that or during." He called out from the other room. "Have Lt. Lem coordinate with … uh, Fuseb I guess. He has access to my calendar." With that, the water came on.

She had time to throw on a shift and see to a few of her morning needs, while he showered, then ran the pressurized air cycle, then went about getting dressed. They kissed again and she pressed a peach into his hand. "Breakfast."

"These were for you."

"They were for us. And I'll have some after you've gone. You said breakfast was your favorite meal. Eat it and think of me."

He kissed her again and made his way out.


	10. Diplomatic Lunch

**A/N: Contingency, Thrawn, Sloane – I'm not sure if these are canon or EU, but they're long-established parts of the Star Wars universe.**

_Day 10_

Rey easily spotted the big Sirpan across the room. Brumos Fuseb waved to her, indicating the table he was reserving for their group. The First Order tended to take meals in a cafeteria-style setting – long trestle tables set end-to-end with backless, narrow-seated, stool-like chairs to perch on. They weren't much into chairs in the Order, she'd noticed. They had them at some workstations, but there was a lot of routine standing. People were on their feet and moving the majority of the day.

Eating, though, was usually done sitting, with a group. Her group today was Kylo, Lt. Lem, and the staff the First Order had brought to the negotiations on Naboo. She brought over her tray and took a seat. "How did the meeting go?" she asked of Brumos.

"Good, good," he said, settling into his seat. She couldn't imagine that was comfortable given his frame, but he didn't complain. "We finalized a draft of our proposals. Birnham will run it past the grand marshal and a few others before we have the sign-off and send it on to your provisional New Republic leadership council." That was the stand-in replacement for the New Republic's government after the Senate on Hosnian Prime had been obliterated. It included members of the Resistance as well, since there was considerable overlap between the two.

Kylo took the seat next to Rey, tucking his gloves into his belt before handling his cutlery. He smiled warmly at her. "How was your morning?"

"Good. We did a lot of walking. There's just so much to see. This place is huge. We went through some of the environmental maintenance decks – what they would let me see of them – and those were amazing."

"I didn't think of those. Do you want me to alter your security clearance?"

Rey shook her head. "No. It's fine. I don't really need a close look at a sewage treatment plant, but it's fascinating to see how everything is put together. It all links to one another in this enormous, interconnected system. The Order makes these ships so big, they're …" she struggled to find the right words, "they're not even ships. They're cities. Countries? I don't know, but you could drop the entire population of Jakku into this ship three or four times. And probably have a better standard of living."

His smile deepened. "The First Order has a lot of ships like this."

"I know. It's vast." She gestured to Lem. "So we just walked. I wanted a sense of the scale of things."

"It's not something I can walk away from," he said, "until I know it's in good hands." He glanced around at their company, who were either having their own conversations or minding their own business. He went on, "I worry I don't know what I'm doing. Hux … has been very helpful. He tells me the best thing a leader can do is find out what their people are good at and give them the tools and opportunity to do it. Every day, I stumble over new things I don't know anything about. Today it's treaties and how governments … get started." He grimaced and ate the muffin that came with his meal.

"Your mother made an entire career out of this. You were trained as a Jedi and then," she shrugged, "whatever it was Snoke had you doing." She'd seen Ben's body. Whatever his assignments had been, they did not involve sitting at tables, calmly discussing document language or branches of government. "Be patient with yourself."

He made a sour frown, like he was disappointed in himself no matter what.

"Walk me through it then," she said.

"What?"

"What are you in charge of?"

"The First Order."

"No, I mean, a breakdown. We've done this before with problems. Sometimes it makes things clearer."

"Mm." Kylo laid one hand on the table between them with four fingers splayed. "What I'm in charge of," he said and began to tick them off, "the Navy, the Army, the planetary governors, Special projects." He went back to the first finger he'd pointed at. "The Navy are the ships. The fleet. Commanded by admirals and captains." He pointed at the second finger. "The Army consists of ground forces and infiltration. Communications and support services. Stormtroopers. Commanded by generals and troop captains."

He pointed at the third finger. "The planetary governors oversee territory – planets, factories, production, the free citizens, though we don't have many of those. In the empire, they were called moffs. We use different titles." He pointed at the last finger. "Special projects - that's whatever I want to handle personally – my staff, repairing the  _Supremacy_ , the Knights of Ren, and this diplomacy stuff with the New Republic."

"Okay. What are your current problems?"

"The Navy and Army in the field are mostly loyal to me through Hux. A lot depends on the individual. They all respect the chain of command, but Snoke practically trained them to be at odds with each other in the higher ranks. He took out the grand admirals and grand marshals, then he would change up who was in command based on … whims.

"Like, imagine: you can have a navy ship with an admiral, that carries within it a legion of stormtroopers commanded by a general, accompanied by the Knights of Ren and myself, back before Snoke died, in orbit within the territory of a governor. Under Snoke, who was in charge might change over the course of a mission. People were always undercutting each other for his favor. There's less trust than there should be. That's a big problem."

"But Hux is a grand marshal."

"That's me trying to do something about that problem. I promoted him. I wanted one person to be in charge of it so I didn't have two people arguing over who took precedence. It seems to be settling some of the issues for the military. They've stopped lying to me so much. They know Hux. Even if they don't like him, they know what he was like and that he's basically fair even if he is … hard-nosed. They don't think I'm fair. They think I'm unbalanced, reckless …" Kylo shook his head and went back to his food.

"You've been doing this a week now? Maybe two?" Rey shook her head. "It's going to take a lot longer than that for people to get to know you." He nodded.

"Right." But he didn't sound convinced. "The bigger problem, the one I'm stumped on," he said with a sigh, "is our core worlds in the Unknown Regions. Some of them revolted. The leadership is dead or scattered, not in charge of anything. So it's just anarchy with a few pockets of law. The ones that didn't revolt have entrenched. They don't agree I'm the supreme leader and they refuse to support the military in the field. They have some ships, but the planets all have defensive emplacements. The combination of a limited fleet and hardened defense works will make it tough to bring them down with force. Besides, I don't want to turn our guns on my own people.

"The High Command – which is the highest ranked members of the Army, Navy, and the planetary governors – are split right now. I might be able to talk with them, but the core of their disagreement is who I am. After the empire was overthrown, the emperor had plan called the Contingency to destroy anyone loyal to him who survived his death. It wasn't carried out in full, but enough died to terrify the rest. The First Order was made by those who survived, who vowed never to allow that to happen again – no single Force user would rise to power like the emperor and subvert justice and order. But they failed.

"The Order had a problem about a decade ago, when their best two leaders disappeared. First Rae Sloane didn't return from a mission, then Thrawn vanished trying to find her. They never came back. In the next few years of indecision and argument about what to do, Snoke put himself forward. He promised secrets to navigation in the Unknown Regions that would help the Order find out where the others had gone. It sounded like the same pitch Thrawn had made, and Thrawn wasn't a problem.

"But Snoke manipulated people, the way he did. Factions formed. People were turned. The High Command didn't even know what was happening to it and by the time they did, they had a supreme leader, a single Force user who was exactly what they had risen to stand against.

"I arrived … about that time, with the knights. When people tried to overthrow him, we killed them. We had no loyalty to the Order. We were loyal to Snoke, because he was giving us protection from Luke. That's why the High Command hates me. They fear me. They want me out because they think I'll continue Snoke's legacy. It's going to take a long time for them to see me differently, if they ever do. Hux has come around and so have some of his people, and," he shrugged, "like you say, it's only been a week, so maybe there's a chance. I think I can do good here, if I have the opportunity."

"I think you can, too. Even if all you did for them was get rid of Snoke, you did good."


	11. Showdown

_**A/N: The Eclipse, armament, and features – canon (or EU). Named admirals are OC.** _

_Day 10_

They came out of hyperspace so smoothly that Rey barely noticed it. It would have been amazing for any lesser ship. The  _Finalizer_  was a top-of-the-line ship of the First Order. She marveled anyway about it, setting down her spoon and smiling to herself as she thought about how perfect the ship's calibration had to be to achieve that. Someone, somewhere in the Order, should be very proud, she thought to herself.

Kylo glanced at her and opened his mouth to say something, then his expression went vacant. He went to attention in his seat – spine straight, hands next to his plate, face still blank.

"Kylo?" Rey asked him. Brumos, across the table from Kylo, peered at him with narrowed eyes.

"Something's wrong." Kylo spoke no louder than a whisper, so she barely heard him in the crowded mess hall. "Hux? What's-" He tilted his head to the side. Brumos raised a clenched fist into the air – a fairly universal signal to stop or hold. Claxons sounded a second later.

Rey winced at the sound and shrank somewhat in her seat. The hall erupted into even more noise, although everyone in beige either sat unmoving, or sat back down as soon as they saw the fist. All the rest, in black or grey, began streaming out as quickly as possible, food abandoned as they answered what was obviously a call to battle stations.

Brumos waited, fist aloft. Rey put her hand over Kylo's. It was bare, as he hadn't finished his meal and put his gloves back on yet. She needed to know what was happening. She extended her senses along his, following the tendrils of the Force like she'd done before.

His attention was on Hux. It wasn't the same as when they'd located Gracynn, when all they saw was his face. This time, she could see most of the bridge, or at least all of it that Hux was paying attention to. The precise locus of Hux's attention was evident as well. They were inside his mind, she realized, not looking down on him from above. It was like being there, but she had a sense of Hux's thoughts as well.

"All shields are up, sir." She couldn't see who had said that.

"Weapons should be charged within sixty seconds." That was from the person whose shoulder Hux was looking over, reviewing the same information. Then he moved on.

Hux said, "It's the Thrawn gambit, but it won't do them any good. Scramble the fighters for a perimeter line. No engagement until I give the order." He turned to someone else. "Lt. Mitaka, signal the fleet at Ganeez to get here immediately."

"Should we inform the supreme leader, sir?" She wasn't sure who that was, either. He was an older man with a lot of insignia on his uniform, but Hux didn't look at the outfit enough for her to work out his rank.

"He knows," Hux said curtly. "I-"

"Sir, long range communications are being jammed!" the one he'd called Lt. Mitaka cut in to say. He seemed to be the communications officer.

"Fine. Plot a hyperspace jump to take us to the Ganeez fleet instead, then send it out short range to all our ships."

"They'll intercept it," the older man said.

"That's my intention," Hux replied. "If we go, I intend for them to follow.  _If_  we go. Let them spin up their hyperdrives just in case. It delays the charging of their weapons."

"We can't jump with the  _Eclipse_  here," the older man insisted. "That flagship has gravity well projectors."

"I  _know_ , Captain. I have been running scenarios for this sort of conflict all week. They have a range and they can be disabled. Maybe they'll waste their time charging them up as well – anything to delay that laser. Commander Adar, run a decloaking scan as long as no one is shooting at us yet."

"They should have been charged and oriented as soon as we came out of lightspeed," the older man said.

"They weren't expecting us." Hux jerked his head in the direction of the viewports. "At least not at this precise moment. Obviously they came here looking for us. But it means none of the  _Supremacy_  screening force saw fit to leak our schedule to them. It's a good sign."

Kylo asked,  _Can you show me what we're up against?_

"We have a communication from the  _Eclipse_ , sir. High Command," said Mitaka.

 _In a moment, Supreme Leader. Let me work_. "No doubt," Hux answered. "Let them hold. How are the canons, Lieutenant?"

"Armed in ten seconds."

"Good enough." Hux moved to the front of the bridge, looking out the viewport.  _Here. You see, Ren?_  he asked mentally. Hux looked across a star field that was littered with ships, all in graceful motion, no two moving the same direction or speed. He looked from one to another in quick succession, mentally adding names to the ones he recognized, clearly for Kylo's benefit. Rey didn't think he was aware she was there. The broken hulk of the  _Supremacy_  lay between them and below. Lights twinkled on it.

 _I see it,_ Ren thought to him. _That must be every ship they have._

 _I believe so,_ Hux answered.  _They've pulled out all the stops. This sort of all-or-nothing stand means they're likely to fight to the bitter end._

"Sir, the  _Eclipse_  requests-"

"Yes, put them on," Hux said. A moment later, Mitaka gave him a nod. "Hux here."

A woman's voice came through the speaker. "General Hux. The High Command orders you to immediately stand down and deliver to us the usurper and the assassin of Supreme Leader Snoke."

' _General'. Hmpf._  Hux said archly, "I will not. Although I must say I appreciate you coming out from behind your planetary emplacements. That makes things much easier for us. To what do I owe the honor?"

"We will not stand by idly while you sell the Order to the New Republic! Should you choose to resist, you will not prevail."

To Ren, he thought,  _Ah, they know about Naboo. It undercuts them and takes away their leverage if we get other supply lines – they know it as well as we do. At the current engagement scenario, we'll lose whatever they hit with the superlaser, but we'll win the battle, even with us only having a fragment of our fleet here._ To the voice on the comm, he said, "My take on the situation is different. You are outgunned."

"You assume your ships will accept your order to fire on us? That would be folly. Does Captain Peavey still command the  _Finalizer_?"

 _If we lose any ships or worse, they turn against us, the odds shift dramatically._  Hux turned and looked at the older man, who walked up next to him with slow, reserved paces. "He does," Hux said.

"Is he present?"

"He is."

"Captain Peavey, I order you to arrest General Hux."

Hux turned and looked at Peavey with raised brows. He moved his hands as though clasping them behind his back and touched the handle of his knife.  _This is a bad place for a fight. He won't be acting alone if he goes for me._ Hux sized up Peavey's body language.  _He's stupidly close to me. Hands empty. He's not going to make this physical. Not with a man twenty years his junior._  He kept his hand on the knife anyway.

Peavey blanched and looked away, in the direction of the enemy ships parked outside. "I have convened an officer's panel as you, er," he glanced apologetically at Hux, "requested, Admiral Nayta."  _Ordered, he means,_  Hux thought.  _They've been in communication with our captains as I suspected_. Peavey went on, "We do not find grounds to remove the grand marshal from his position."

A slow grin spread across Hux's features as he settled the knife back in its scabbard.  _Oh, that's delightful. 'Grand marshal.' By the way, you really missed the exchange this morning after the staff meeting. I'll have to tell you about that later_. Hux looked out at the stars. "Well, Admiral Nayta. That must be embarrassing for you. I certainly hope your entire strategy did not depend on instigating a mutiny."  _Would be nice if it did._

"You should be embarrassed that it has even come to this," she fumed. "If you turn over the fugitives, it will go well for you. If not, we will settle the issue by concentrating all fire on the  _Finalizer_  until there are no survivors."

 _Oh. That's a problem. We won't survive that even if they miss with that monster of a blaster they have,_  Hux thought.  _The fleet will win, but we'll be dead. Not optimal._ "Fugitives, plural?"

"Yes, both of them," the admiral said. "The usurper Kylo Ren and the assassin, Rey."

 _I'm an assassin? But you-_  Rey's thought was interrupted.

The grand marshal shuddered at the realization someone other than Ren was in his head.  _Get out! Get out! Get out!_  With every 'get out' she had the feeling of being mentally battered, like a boot slamming into her, fueled by a blinding surge of terror and rage fused into one. The mental contact ended with a snap after the third 'strike', faster than Rey could end it herself as she reeled from the unexpected attack.

"Um, sorry?" she said to no one in particular, her awareness back in the mess hall.

Kylo had a pained, then perplexed expression on his face. "He can do that? He's never done that before."

"Never what?"

"Kicked me out." He looked at Brumos, then up at the man's fist, then down the table at the two dozen or so of his waiting staff. They answered to him, not Hux. "Go to battle stations," Kylo directed. They scrambled away. Kylo got to his feet more sedately. "Hux?" He winced a moment later. "Okay …"

"He kicked you out again?"

Kylo nodded to her. "I could overwhelm him, but I need him uncompromised. Not distracted fighting with me."

"What was that anyway? What you were doing, what I was watching? We were seeing things through his eyes. We were … inside him."

"You have to know the person to do it. Snoke called it surveillance."

"Snoke could do that?"

"He's the one who taught me. He did it all the time."

Rey felt something physically, a faint, intermittent vibration, but more importantly there was something shifting in the Force. It was like the static electricity that preceded a dust storm on Jakku. "Oh. We're under attack, aren't we?"

"Yes," Kylo said grimly. "It's started. The shields should hold for a while." And yet Kylo stood there, looking thoughtful and doing nothing. "He's fighting for me." Kylo looked humbled by that. "He could have given us up, especially after kicking us out of his head and blocking me."

"He trusts you," she said, trying to snap him back to attention on the moment. "There must be something we can do to help. Take down this Admiral Nayta and whichever others are commanding their ships. Do you know them well enough for us to do that?"

"Yes. I've met most of the High Command. They're close. This should be simple. Let's start with her." He offered his hand. They sank to the floor on the mess hall, joining both hands and opening minds to one another. It was easier this time because there were no lightyears of distance to traverse. Nayta was on the  _Eclipse_.

The only issue was getting through the mess of distracting activity in local space. Canons from multiple warships were bombarding the  _Finalizer_ , Hux's dreadnoughts were moving to shield them, star destroyers moving in on the High Command ships, TIE fighters zooming to engage other small craft, and so many other maneuvers going on that Rey couldn't keep track. It was chaos. The occasional stray shot struck the  _Supremacy_.

Kylo didn't wait for the admiral to recognize him.  _Turn_ , Kylo ordered her, pulling on Rey's power as well as his own to fuel the command. A Jedi mind trick usually failed outright against those of strong will, and none rose to power within the First Order without a level of personal resolve and determination that even the Resistance found uncommon. Under normal circumstances, there was no way this would have worked. But Kylo Ren's power in the Force was such that one as venerable and learned as Snoke had noticed him from across the galaxy when he was but a potential. Rey matched him for power and melded seamlessly with him, doubling it.

It was more than a human mind could bear. Plus, perhaps Hux was right and Kylo was clumsy. In any case, Admiral Nayta choked out, "Cease fire!", gasped, and collapsed.

 _Did I kill her? Um … Well, I'll check later. Next … Prok._  Kylo cast about for him, once again navigating the dizzying awareness going on between where they were and where he was seeking.

 _The_  Eclipse  _is still firing,_  Rey pointed out, unable to take her attention from it. The ship was distinctive in solid black and a different hull design. As a product of the Empire, it was only two-thirds the length of the  _Finalizer_ , but it packed more punch even at the reduced size. It was made for ship-to-ship engagements. While the  _Finalizer_  was no slouch, it was not the superior ship in a head-to-head shoot-out. Plus, the  _Finalizer_  was running and hiding, letting the other ships dish out damage while all fire from the High Command vessels poured into her.

 _They might not have had time to process the command yet,_ Kylo thought. _The admiral collapsing on the bridge might have confused things._

 _Look!_ Rey thought to him, directing his attention to the swelling light at the end of the  _Eclipse's_  prow.

_That's the superlaser._

_Like the Death Star?_

_Yes. Whatever it hits is destroyed. Including us._

_Then let's make it miss._

He nodded and they put their combined focus on it. The limits to the Force weren't known to her, but if she could lift boulders with her will, then the laws of physics were no barrier. The Force operated on a level beyond her conscious understanding. It didn't have to conform to her idea of reality – reality would conform to it.

She opened herself to it, let it flow through her, feeling the space between the ships and the fractional degrees of orientation as they maneuvered. The laser was an absolutely straight line and this was critical to aiming. The  _Finalizer_  was already presenting the narrowest possible profile – Hux wasn't an idiot – and moving as evasively as a nineteen hundred meter long star destroyer could, weaving its way through their own ships, even though allowing the laser to strike one of them instead wasn't much of an improvement.

She could feel the dark side energy that wrapped the  _Eclipse_  like it was a shrine. It reminded her of the cave on Ach-To. This wasn't the enemy, she realized. It was a part of them. This was not one ship against another, but both of them in a dance. The dark side was an energy of pain, suffering, and betrayal. A civil war primed it; or perhaps it caused the strife to start with. There was a pattern here that lingered at the edge of her ability to understand.

The  _Eclipse_  was an instrument of focusing that power onto others, but it melted away in the purest Light of acceptance. This was no fight, she saw. It was healing. She gently took control from Kylo and directed their combined energy through the black vessel rather than against it. One engine overcompensated by the smallest margin, shifting the laser's aim. The next second, the beam erupted and scalding, purifying energy split space – the space directly below the  _Finalizer's_  keel – and streaked off harmlessly into the void. It struck nothing, not even a TIE fighter.

There was a rumble through the  _Finalizer_  as the shields buckled, briefly overloaded by the peripheral back blast of the laser, but then they stabilized. It was the nearest clean miss possible.


	12. Alternatives

_Day 10_

Kylo was silent in stunned admiration. Rey could tell he couldn't even begin to wrap his mind around what she'd done – 'with' and 'through' rather than 'over' and 'against'. For the briefest moment, the  _Eclipse_  looked grey in her mind.

 _There's Admiral Prok. Over there._  Kylo pulled himself together and focused their attention to the biggest of the escort ships, a mammoth  _Lucrehulk_ -styled battleship which was probably the transport and coordination center for the host of smaller vessels.

 _Something is wrong,_  Rey said, echoing what Kylo had said earlier. It didn't have anything to do with the ships or the superlaser. She could feel it, though. It was like every bit of light she'd infused into the  _Eclipse_  was draining off like water, leaving it utterly black in the wake of it. Something was about to happen.

He hesitated.  _We can work that out after we take out their leadership. Even if subordinates take over, it will sow confusion_. He tried to pull her attention to the fair-skinned admiral. Reluctantly, she agreed, but the strange, dark flagship of the High Command refused to leave her mind, as though it knew they'd been the ones to divert it. Kylo brought the man's consciousness into his mind, but a moment later, blackness blotted out their awareness.

An image came to them both. They were looking down as a red-hued lightsaber emerged from their chest – no, a woman's chest, or that of a girl. Rey could sense she was seeing this through someone else's eyes, someone who was using every shred of limited, drugged consciousness to send this vision to Kylo, with a wordless plea for help, or revenge. It was her own blade, a perversion she resented more than the murder. There was rage, trapped fury, pain, and a fading awareness with a feeling of being sucked down into the well of the dark side that was the  _Eclipse_. The saber retracted. Someone behind her laughed. A male voice: "They die easy enough." Death.

"Jophesta!" Kylo cried out aloud. Grief ran through him, and anger. Rey was directly linked with him as he drowned in the dark side. She tightened her grip on his hands, trying to remember: 'with', not 'over'; 'through', not 'against.' This wasn't something to avoid or fight.

 _Who is she?_  Rey asked. Clearly she mattered to Kylo, perhaps as much as his parents, but his grief was less muddled and complicated than it had been with them.

 _Jophesta! One of the knights. They have the knights, the Knights of Ren!_  Desperately, he sought them out. Four lives he touched, scattered on the High Command capital ships, all sedated but alive. The fifth he could not find, but he sensed it merely meant she was not near. The sixth was Jophesta.  _They're going to kill one of them every time I suborn someone. I have to surrender!_

 _That was a girl. She couldn't have been over … fifteen,_  Rey thought in confusion, trying to work out how one of the fearsome Knights of Ren was younger than Rey herself.  _You were all Luke's students, right?_

 _She was the youngest of us!_  Kylo responded in her mind, distraught. _Did you think Luke Skywalker's students were all of an age? The Force is not so convenient. She was brought to him as a youngling, just two years before Luke tried to kill me. Her parents saw her as a wild animal, unmanageable, dangerous. Luke had no skills as a parent and she was too young for him to intimidate the way he wanted, but they dumped her and left. He taught her next to nothing. She believed me that he would try to murder me in my sleep. I wasn't the only one he failed!_

 _I brought her with me. I couldn't leave her with him! She's the one who chose the name Ruin, then Ren. Always a child! Snoke said that Brendol Hux's first recruits had been her age when she'd been brought to Skywalker, that she would manage with us, that she'd learn. He said the Jedi of old started even younger. Six years she's been with me. She's not an animal. She was_ never _an animal._  He shook with rage, the dark side continuing to boil up inside of him. He tried to pull his hands away to isolate himself, but Rey gripped harder.

_No. Together, Kylo. You're not alone. Don't make yourself alone._

_If I feel this, then you're feeling it. You shouldn't have to!_

_Yes, I feel it, too. Let me feel it. Let yourself feel it._

He looked at her, dry-eyed until now. Tears began to stream down. She cried with him. He thought,  _I want to kill them all._

_You'd have to get them all at once on different ships, people you don't know. Even with my help, I don't think you can do that. Don't bring the Force into this. Let it dissipate. We'll handle it another way._

_I'll surrender, then. This is my fault. They all die because of me._ He was so upset he wasn't thinking straight, thoughts leaping from one improbable idea to another. She recalled the story of how Luke had lured him out on Crait and wasted his time in a similar way – letting Kylo's fragile emotional state distract him. He finally tore his hands away from hers and pulled out his comm link.

"Kylo, no. We should talk about this."

He activated it anyway. "Hux. Surrender."

"What? They missed!" Hux sounded giddy about that. "It will take them minutes to recharge. I'll have this won by then."

"Surrender. Call them. Tell them I will surrender myself. Now! That's an order!"

"Hux," Rey said, "Help me." Kylo glared at her, but said nothing to her.

There was a beat of silence on the other end. Kylo bared his teeth at the comm. No longer giddy, Hux asked carefully, "What are the terms, Supreme Leader?"

"They have four of the Knights of Ren. They're going to kill one every time I strike at them through the Force. Trade me for them. Whatever that requires. I am giving you an order."

Hux spoke politely. "I hear you. I will obey. Supreme Leader, Rey, give me a moment to get that started and buy some time so we can discuss how to achieve what you want." In the background she could hear him ordering a communications line opened with a request for parley. Then his voice came in louder through his personal comm, the one Kylo had called. It was less polite now. "They will kill all of you, you know. If you surrender on their terms, every Force user will die. I can promise you."

Kylo looked at Rey. "Including you. But we're linked. If they kill me, they kill you anyway!" His brows pulled together. He wiped the tears from his face.

She nodded. "That's on my mind, yes, but mostly I'm not going to stand by while you throw your life away. It's noble but pointless. I love you." She felt the subtle thrumming through the ship end. It was the vibration of impacts against them and the continuous adjustments of the shields, along with the charging and firing of their own weaponry. The stillness was a relief.

"How do I make this work?" Kylo said, confused.

"They've stopped firing," Hux said. "So have we. Still no verbal response on my call, though. This is a horrible time for us to do nothing. They're recharging that superlaser."

"I took out Admiral Nayta," Kylo said. "She might be dead. They're probably figuring out a new spokesperson."

"Oh," Hux said tensely. "Well … thank you for that, I suppose, but I'd rather they hurried up."

"They killed one of mine," Kylo said, wallowing. "It wasn't worth it."

Hux could hear the hopeless tone. "Supreme Leader, it is not lost on me that there is a ship before us that contains  _over a million_  hostages. It has no functional shields and precious little working weaponry because we prioritized all repairs to the superstructure and life support. Do you know why the High Command has not intentionally fired on the  _Supremacy_?"

"No." He sounded sulky, not appreciating the lecture.

"Because they know I will sacrifice it and everyone on it in a heartbeat! I'm using it for cover even now. I know this is a hard lesson, but if you give away the First Order for four lives, assuming it works, then you have done so very cheaply. We're worth more than that.  _You_ are worth more than that." There was a tone of cold fury in Hux's voice that completely wiped away Kylo's self-pity as he hissed, "Do you know how many lives I have already spent for you in the past few minutes?"

"No," Kylo's voice was quiet.

"Neither do I. But it's more than four. If that laser hits, it will be  _ten thousand times_  that. Remember what I said about Naboo? Don't do anything stupid. They've only stopped firing because it's useful to them! Now I have to figure something else out!" Hux paused for a moment, seething quietly. "Am I still required to surrender you to them?"

"No." The comm link creaked in Kylo's hand as his grip tightened. He put it on the floor and breathed heavily, leaning forward over the link.

"Thank you," Hux snapped on the other end of it. "I'll make your people the first priority."

"It's all my fault," Kylo said quietly, in a more level voice than Rey would have expected from him at that moment.

Rey told him, "There are people here who mean the same to each other as the knights do to you. They're still alive because we worked together, because of what you did. We saved everyone on this ship, Kylo. That's important. You know these people." He reached out and took her hand. "Breathe," she told him. "We'll do it again if we have to."

Despite her words, Rey worried about what Jophesta's death had done to the energy on the  _Eclipse_ , and more specifically, the energy in Kylo. But the dark side was not saturating him now like it had only moments before. By no means was he recovered, but he wasn't lost, either.

They could hear through the comm as Hux finally got a response.

"This is Admiral Prok of the High Command. We demand that you surrender and turn over the fugitives."

"Oh, knock it the fuck off," Hux said crossly.

Kylo blinked at the comm link on the floor, startled out of his funk. "He said 'fuck'?"

There was a very long silence, as though Kylo wasn't the only one shocked that Hux would speak like that so openly. Then Prok said, "Did you call for a parley, or just an opportunity to be abusive one last time before you die?"

"I shouldn't even have to call for a parley. Why are we bleeding the First Order for this? Kylo Ren is a ranking officer of the Order. He's not a fugitive. He is performing his appointed duties as required of his station. Put him on trial if you wish. Convene an officer's panel of those who have observed him and worked with him since Snoke's death. Solicit testimony. If you convict him, let it be on the basis of his actions and not because you're terrified of a monster in the dark!"

"Rules," Rey said quietly, nodding. "Like I said for Captain Gracynn. It doesn't have to be settled this way, by fighting."

Kylo's brows raised in surprise. "I hadn't thought of that. How did I not think of that?"

Because, she thought, the rule of law was a foreign principle for him. It had never shielded him in the past, but only been used against him as a weapon he couldn't possibly fight. Yet it governed the First Order from top to bottom. It was the only thing that kept the evil endemic in the system from being entirely unchecked and destroying everything. It was the Order's absolute terror of Force-users that was causing them to be so over-the-top, so certain Ren wouldn't play by the rules that they never considered asking. None of their communications had been directed to him. He wasn't even worth speaking to.

There was a bit of silence, as though Prok were having a side conversation. Then he came back. "This was your job! You were to have conducted an investigation on the death of Snoke. What evidence do you have that Kylo Ren is innocent of murder or collaboration to commit it?"

"Put me on trial as well, then!" Hux said heatedly. "Requisition my calendar. I've been busy! You might not have noticed, but the entirety of the New Republic has capitulated to us! I won the war, Admiral, with no  _Supremacy_ , no support from the High Command, and no Starkiller Base! Yet they bow to us nonetheless! And you have the nerve to criticize me that I didn't file a kriffing report with you in a timely manner? I did, in fact, find time in my schedule to investigate. There are only two people living who know the truth of what happened in that room. I am not a mind-reader. Even if they tell me, I cannot know if they are giving the truth. I am acting on my best judgement  _as I have been trained!_

"Your very conduct here, today, the presence of your fleet, the disarray of our core worlds, all speaks to the danger Snoke posed to the Order, the damage he did to us, and to your recognition of it. Look at the sheer number of casualties his hubris has inflicted! We will be decades in recovery. However Snoke died, it was for the good of the Order. I am  _grateful_  that he is gone. As. Are. You."

There was another beat of silence. Then Prok's voice, "You try to pretend we should excuse the highest treason of murdering a superior officer?"

"Murder? I have no idea what happened in that room, Admiral Prok, and neither do you. I know what I saw with my own eyes – Snoke dead by injuries inflicted with a lightsaber. The guards dead from similar. Kylo Ren unconscious. Rey, gone. It happened, as best I can tell, simultaneously with the ramming of the  _Supremacy_ , as I've explained in reports to you that I know you have received. I may not know what happened behind those closed doors, but I know what was happening while Snoke was alive and in charge. I saw him nearly every day. You know that. I know what's happened since he died. Better than you do. The higher treason would be doing anything to punish the removal of that overgrown maggot from the body of the Order."

A smile was suddenly evident in Prok's voice. "Sometimes, Hux, it was tough to tell how you really felt about Snoke."

With an icy voice, Hux said, "Thank you for the compliment, then. I did my duty as diligently as humanly possible. Just as I am doing it now. We need not waste lives blowing each other out of the sky for this, although I'm sure it's just the sort of internecine idiocy Snoke or Palpatine would have approved of."

Prok sighed. "What guarantees do you have that Kylo Ren will not pick us off one by one if we try to put him on trial? Sedate him, and the other as well. It's the only way to be certain."

"I will not sedate my commanding officer," Hux said testily. "That's absurd. He's had all week to pick you off if he wished to do so. I'm certain you know he got Captain Gracynn. You know damn well distance isn't a factor. He had made a deliberate decision to leave the core worlds until we could come to you with a more measured proposal. You're the ones precipitating a civil war here!"

"He was just gathering his strength."

"So that you could ambush us here while we're on a repair run? Very wise of him. If he's the tactical genius you imply, then why am I speaking with you? I could have won this engagement two minutes after signaling for parley and you know it."

"We killed one of the knights."

"Oh yes," Hux said in a tone that contained the vicious smile he was making. "I dare you to kill the rest of them and lose what precious leverage you have. I will not be talking to you after they die, you know. The  _Eclipse_  is the emperor's greatest remaining weapon, as long in the crafting as the Death Star itself, upgraded by the finest First Order engineers, yet unable to correctly target a ship of the  _Finalizer_ 's size at point blank range? I'd love to take credit for that, but you missed because of him. You have made your point with the knight you killed. But if you harm the rest, you remove any reason for him to leave you intact."

"It was an engine malfunction. The error has been corrected. We won't miss again."

"Oh really?" Hux snorted and said sarcastically, "Yes, we all know the Force doesn't allow manipulation of objects, controls, operators, or energy fields at a distance, now does it?" Prok didn't answer right away, so Hux went on, "If you have any faith in me, or my people's assessment of me, then allow me to put the supreme leader on house arrest while the High Command meets, free of his influence, to discuss what is best for the Order in a rational manner. Keep your hostages if that makes you feel better, but for your sake, I'd suggest you keep them in good health. Don't forget – just as he knew you killed that one, he'll know if the others are abused in any way."

* * *

"You heard?" Hux asked into his personal comm link after the discussion with High Command was over. He'd left the channel open.

"Yes," Kylo answered. "Thank you," he said quietly. "You really can do the impossible."

Hux just snorted. "We're not out of the woods yet. But if it all fails, we can always try shooting again."

"I'm to be confined to quarters?" Kylo asked in a more normal tone.

"Both of you. Which quarters you are to be confined to was not specified, nor do I care if you pass back and forth between them. Just be where I can find you at a moment's notice in case it comes up. I may need to prove I have custody of you. I will be doubling the guard. Also, to be in accord with the protocols for house arrest, I will send Captain Phasma or someone of similar rank to remove from you any weapons you might have. These weapons will be stored in a compartment in your quarters. I would prefer you leave them there."

Deadpan, Kylo asked, "You're going to put my lightsaber in a drawer in my room and claim you disarmed me?"

Hux sighed. "I acknowledge you as my current commanding officer and rightful supreme leader of the First Order. These conditions from the High Command are no more binding than suggestions. We comply with them to give the appearance of dealing with them in good faith. It will weigh in your favor in the trial, assuming it even comes up. If you find something too onerous, let me know so we can discuss an adjustment. Please do not act in defiance. It would be the worst possible thing you could do."

"I will not," Kylo promised.

"Thank you," Hux said. "I will have your meals delivered. In the meantime, enjoy your time off. I will be consulting with attorneys and will brief you this evening in whichever quarters you happen to be in."

Kylo smiled at Rey wanly, who returned the look. Being locked in a room with each other all day was not a disappointing prospect. They had a lot to process. "Thank you, Hux, again."


	13. Lying in Wait

_Day 10_

The walk back to their quarters felt odd. Lt. Lem and the two stormtroopers shadowed them at a distance. They'd trailed Rey and Lem all morning, more closely but not paying as much attention and occasionally chatting in the way long-familiar co-workers might. They seemed like nice enough people, but they'd fallen silent after Kylo told them in the lunch room that they needed escort to their rooms, where they were to be placed under house arrest. She was starting to get a sense of the posturing of stormtroopers and what it meant. There was no need to use the Force to read them, but you did need to watch. The unmoving look they gave Kylo spoke volumes. There was no 'Yes sir' or even acknowledgment of the order.

"This must be very strange for them," Rey said quietly as they walked, "your stormtroopers, FN-8311 and FN-8214, back there – you telling them they were arresting you."

Kylo said, equally quietly so it wouldn't carry, "FN-8311 is wondering what her duty is if there's a problem. If she's supposed to call for backup or actually try to subdue us, which she is certain wouldn't be successful. FN-8214 just thinks this is not how he expected to die. When Captain Phasma notified him of his duty change last night, he was looking forward to an easy shift."

"Well," Rey said, "I think most of us were thinking today would be easier than it has been."

Kylo nodded. "I thought that about now, I'd be getting the report from the  _Supremacy_  on how repairs had gone while we were on Naboo. The scaffolding should be finished to put it back in one piece. We're waiting for some struts from Kaso Tul to make it space worthy, and for scheduling with the Bint Matho foundry on Kuat, which was giving us some problems." He frowned. Not for the first time, his fingers stroked hers as they walked. As she had each time before, she took hold of his gloved hand for a few moments and gave it a squeeze.

"There are different problems now," he said with a sigh.

"It will be okay," Rey said. She believed it, too. This felt right, like the solution they needed. They continued quietly until they reached her quarters. She walked in. Kylo paused at the door. "Come on," she said. When the doors slid shut, she smiled at him. "You can follow me. You don't have to wait for an invitation."

"I don't want to impose. Just because of last night, doesn't mean I …" He shrugged.

"I appreciate that, I do, Kylo. But we're in this together."

"That's … part of the problem. I didn't mean to get you involved in this. They're after you as well. And if I let them have me, then it hurts you."

"I know how it works. So no sacrificing yourself, okay?" He blinked at her and then looked down for a second. "You seem like the sort to do it – noble and selfless. Betrayed by what Luke did, being what Snoke wanted you to be, feeling worthless. Like Hux said, you're worth more than that."

His mouth moved uncomfortably. Put on the spot, he disengaged from her and walked over to a blank section of the wall. "I need to check on a few things." He pressed the corner of a panel, which lit up to a view screen she hadn't realized was there. He pulled up video from the exterior of the ship, long views along the hulls. Rey came over to watch with him. There were a lot of pockmarks and scorches from impacts and blasts, but they were scattered. It looked like the armor had held up in most areas.

She watched as he flipped slowly through the different angles. Then he went to another menu screen, selected different options, and put in a security code. A wireframe of the ship came up with sectors highlighted in yellow and red, or not highlighted at all. He touched the screen, rotating the ship along different axes to see all sides. Then he went through the menu again and pulled up a wall of text. He read the first few lines and scrolled dismissively through the next few pages. He sorted it a few different ways and repeated, then returned to the wireframe.

He tapped on a red section, expanding it.

"What's that?" she asked.

"Hull breach. Two blast doors were triggered. See, here?" He pointed at a symbol. "But the temperature and pressure profiles look within tolerance. The containment field must be holding. Overall, we didn't take much damage. The shields must have held. I would assume Hux put all power to them after Nayta said she'd focus on us. I know we were shooting back, but there's enough power to run shields at full and most of the weapons. Let's look at the rest of our ships. All those shots had to be going somewhere."

He went back to another screen, put in another security code, and brought up similar information on one of the dreadnoughts. It had minimal damage. He switched to the next. It had two engines out and a significant, but not crippling, degree of hull damage in one section. He scanned over it. "That can be repaired." He flipped through the various star destroyers that had escorted them to Naboo, then the  _Supremacy_  and the ones that had been left to guard it. Nothing contradicted Hux's claim that he was winning the engagement handily when Kylo had interrupted him with a demand they surrender.

"I wish there was a report showing response rate, in case any of them didn't come to our defense. I didn't look at that earlier, during the battle. I should have. Hux said the odds would be different if they didn't back us."

"Since we turned out fine, I think that's your answer."

He nodded. "Now let me see …" He tried another menu and security code. The screen flashed red and he smiled. "The High Command has blocked my access to their ship systems. That's funny. Would be funnier if they hadn't. I should make sure we've blocked them out, too."

She chuckled. "Can you control ships through that?" She gestured at the screen.

"No. It's just reports. The controls are all manual. There's debate about this much information being out there as well. It makes people rely on the system and the system can be corrupted. Hacked." He tapped in a quick message to Hux about checking security access for ranking First Order members not currently loyal to them and hit send. "Hm, one other thing." He pulled up one last screen. Icons flashed red, so many of them he had to switch it to text. There were still screens of it to scroll past. His face was impassive.

"Those are the dead," she said, reading his withdrawal.

"Yes. Mostly TIE fighter pilots." He swallowed. "Most of the ships the High Command brought were small. I'm sure the fighters kept them off of us, so that all we had to seriously worry about was that superlaser. If you and I had been trying to ward off hundreds of smaller ships, we couldn't have done it." He snapped off the view screen. "More than four," he said bitterly. "And then there's whatever the High Command lost. Those are First Order as well." He paced the room with a shake of his head.

"What do you do to come down off of a mission?" she asked him, because he was obviously agitated. "Do you meditate?"

He scoffed. "I usually don't care. I go to sleep. Sometimes I'll hit things if the mission went badly. Go to a simulation room and tear apart some practice droids. Or practice dummies, since all I want to do is crush things." He clenched his fist. His knuckles cracked and the fine leather of the glove creaked, but there was no Force to it. It was just an illustration. "The last week has been … different. Since Crait. Since Snoke died. He's not in my head."

Rey blinked at him, suddenly realizing something. "He was in your head. Often. With that power you used on Hux." Kylo glanced over at her and didn't say anything. "Did you even know when he was doing that?"

He shook his head. "Not always. Like Hux said, he was smooth when he wanted to be. He couldn't do it at a distance, though. He could do it across a ship, if he were all by himself. But for further out, he used us, the knights, to lend him power the same way you do with me."

"Oh. To boost his abilities."

Kylo nodded. "I don't think he could have ruled the First Order without us. It's all a repeating pattern, a cycle. One bad decision leading to another."

Rey leaned over and retrieved a fruit from the box. It was yellow, fist-sized, and sort of blobby. "They weren't bad decisions, Kylo. The more you tell me, the more they look like the best decisions you could have made under the circumstances you were in. Let's learn from them and make better ones." She bit into the fruit, only to find the skin was inedible, or at least unsavory. "Ew."

"You peel those. Run your fingernail along it." He made a motion miming what she was to do. She looked at her almost non-existent, stubby nails. "Do you have fingernails?" he asked.

"Not ones I could peel a fruit with."

"Oh. Okay." He sat down on the edge of the bed next to her and took the fruit, taking off his gloves and peeling it himself. He handed it to her when done, but she took the fruit with one hand and his hand with the other.

She looked at his nails. They were short, but not the nubs hers were. "They're all so straight and even. How do you do that? Do they grow like that for you?"

He gave her the oddest, most amused smile. "It's called a manicure. Have you … heard of a manicure?"

"Yes, but … you have those here? I thought that was a thing for … other places."

"Yes," he said gently, taking his hand back. "We have those here." He was still smiling. "If we're still on house arrest tomorrow, I'll set something up with a grooming droid."

"Sounds good." She turned to the fruit. Inside, it was a creamy, greenish color. She bit into it, finding it tangy and sweet with a heated aftertaste like a pepper. She offered it to him as she had the pear, the day before. He took a bite as she held it. "Mm. Spicy."

"To better decisions," she said, like it was a toast. "And a manicure." He nodded, watching her eat.

"Do you want more?" She offered the fruit to him again.

He shook his head. "Not so big on spicy food. It's okay. The fruit's ripe. I've had them before. Some are milder than that one, but they're usually seen as 'better' if they're hotter like that."

"First Order food must really appeal to you, then. How did you know how to peel this, then?"

"I traveled with my mother to a lot of different planets. Then, when I was at the academy, Luke had an assistant, a cook, who set a mixed table. All the students were from different places and she made an effort to serve favorites from each person's home world. There'd be a theme each week. And since the academy was the only school some of us were getting, we'd get a geography and political lesson on the place while she was at it. She was nice."

"What happened to her when the temple burned down?"

"They lived off site. Her and her mate. He was the groundskeeper, but he also taught us crafts. I suppose they were out of a job, but they weren't harmed. Did you have any teachers when you were growing up?"

Rey grimaced. "Some. Unkar himself taught me to read and do math when I was small. Then he gave me instructions and manuals so I could fix things, put together assemblies, or disassemble things for him. That was how I worked before I was old enough to go out very far on my own. Horvins was a trader who would tell me about planets and history, customs, people. He liked to talk a lot. I liked to listen. Which was how I picked up most of what I know."

Kylo nodded, listening. The door buzzed as she was finishing. He stood, dropped off the peels on the table, and walked over to the door. "Open."

Outside was Captain Phasma. "Sir. I have been directed to relieve you of your weapons." He took a step back to allow her inside. The door slid shut behind her. Kylo unclipped his lightsaber and handed it over with an unamused expression. Phasma's expression was the usual stormtrooper blank, but she didn't look at him any longer than usual or show any other posture change. She opened a nearby compartment in the wall and put the lightsaber in it, closing it. "Thank you, sir."

She turned to Rey, who was still sitting on the bed. "I am also to relieve Rey of her weapons."

"She doesn't have any," Kylo said. Rey's brows drew together slightly and she could have sworn Phasma gave him essentially the same look. The helmet turned towards Kylo, then a bit further so she was looking directly at Rey's quarterstaff, which was leaned up in the corner.

"No," Rey said, standing. "That's not how this is going to go." She walked over to the staff, picked it up, and brought it to Phasma. The captain took it from her after a glance at Kylo, who said nothing.

Phasma opened a vertical compartment apparently meant for hanging clothes and stowed the quarterstaff inside it.

"It might seem silly," Rey said, "But there are rules and I don't want anyone to get in trouble."

That seemed to satisfy the captain, who looked to Kylo and said, "Sir. I have stationed two additional guards outside. They have been ordered to accompany you wherever you go, unless it is to your quarters or unless you order them otherwise."

"You're on house arrest and people will still follow your orders? How does that work?" Rey was perplexed by some of this. That was sillier than the shenanigans with the weapons.

"No one can give orders to the supreme leader. No matter what." Kylo said. "Snoke's rule. Not even if I'm in chains. Not even supposed to say anything that could be construed as an order. The decree was very specific. Anyone who worked closely with Snoke knew it by heart. I can't say I've paid much attention to how people have talked to me, though. It needs to be changed. Though I'm not sure I want it changed until after this is over."

Phasma looked to him for a moment longer than necessary, and said, "The law is writ in blood."

"In blood the law is writ," Kylo responded formulaically. It was an apparently familiar call-and-response.

Phasma came to attention, addressed them both as sir, and left.

Rey watched her go. "I don't know if I'll ever get used to that. The 'sir' stuff."

Kylo shrugged. "It's familiar. A routine. It gives a sense of belonging." He sounded sad. "Not that I ever really belonged here. It feels like I'm going to lose everything." He looked anxious.

"You won't," Rey said. When he looked to her, she said, "You're not going to lose me." She put the central seed of the fruit on the table next to the peelings and went back to the bed. "Let's lie down. Take a deep breath. Let it go."


	14. Offenses

_Day 10_

Kylo Ren nodded soberly and laid down on the opposite side of the bed, stretching himself out for his considerable length and folding his hands over his midsection like some kind of statue. He shut his eyes and breathed out heavily a few times. Rey composed herself next to him and did the same, thinking maybe it was a meditation pose she wasn't familiar with. She had thought they would just lie together, maybe talk, or touch, or something like that, but then he twitched. She looked over to find him asleep. "Kylo?" she said quietly, but he was completely out. She smiled, realizing he'd coped in exactly the way he said he was accustomed to.

She was alone for the afternoon, then. She thought about getting out the Jedi texts from her chest, but opted against it. Instead, she practiced levitating fruit, reaching out with her senses, and a few of the other things they'd worked on. When that seemed tiring, she just lay on her side and watched him. He was beautiful, she thought. Handsome, with a distinguished look. At one point, his breathing changed. Nostrils flared. Eyes moved under lids. His muscles jerked faintly.

Rey wondered if she ought to touch him – to wake him, or to enter his mind and try to sooth him. If it was a nightmare, it didn't seem severe, but it did put her on a different line of thought. If he woke to her reading his mind, it might echo the way he'd last seen Luke when Ben was a student. That would be bad. Which … why was Luke even in there, at night, reading his mind? Luke had admitted that was his purpose, to interrogate Ben when he couldn't resist, couldn't consent, and possibly wouldn't even remember the violation. But Luke would know. What if it wasn't even the first time he'd done that to a student?

A disgusted cast settled over Rey's face as she realized that the ignition of the lightsaber, followed by actively striking Ben's blade, wasn't the worst sin Luke had committed that night. It was the one Luke had obsessed over and it was the one Ben, now Kylo, was most aware of, but the real issue was why he'd been there to start with. The lightsaber could charitably be set aside as spontaneous, if Luke was to be believed (there was a lot to unpack there). But the decision to wait until his apprentice was asleep and then invade the privacy of his mind was not spontaneous. It was premeditated. No better than some of the things Poe had been upset about Kylo doing.

She had assumed Kylo's habit of casually mind-reading people had been something he'd picked up from Snoke. The whole 'I can take whatever I want' sounded like what she knew of Snoke. But now she realized his first role model for that might not have been some user of the dark side. It might have been the legend himself, if she were to assume Luke had gone to the hut in the dead of the night to do a deeper probe than the casual ones he did during the day. Even casual ones were noticeable. She remembered how blankly Kylo had regarded Poe when Poe was critical of him for doing it. If it was something Luke had done often, then that expression on Kylo's face was more about the hypocrisy than any guilt.

It was an interesting thought that kept her turning things over, looking at them from different points of view, long past when the dream had ceased for Kylo and he'd returned to peaceful slumber. Eventually, the door buzzed. She put her hand on Kylo's upper arm as soon as he seemed awake. "It's the door. I'll get it." He nodded, glancing around the room and sitting up.

Rey went to the door. "Open." It slid open to reveal Grand Marshal Hux, followed by a droid bearing three food trays.

"Good evening," he greeted her.

"Come in." She stepped back. He came in. They arranged the table with the two chairs for Rey and Hux, and Kylo sitting on the edge of the bed because he was the tallest and least troubled by it. Then they dismissed the droid and settled in to eat dinner. As she'd had opportunity to notice on Naboo, First Order custom seemed to be that you waited until the senior ranked member began to eat. This time, Rey waited as did Hux as Kylo situated himself on the bed and finally took up his cutlery. She noticed he gave her a considering look as she picked up her own fork simultaneously with Hux.

But Kylo didn't mention it. He looked across to Hux. "How goes the fleet?"

"Good. We have open communications now and a loose agreement to function as a single unit. They're more or less accepting Captain Peavey's assessment, which means they've reinstated me as part of the High Command. I was previously the foremost and that seems to be the position they're honoring. They have no reason to deny it if they agree I'm in good standing. Your promotion of me came after I was already in that role. They have their complaints about Snoke's standards for promotion, but if they argue too strenuously about it, they look like idiots since they're equal beneficiaries of it."

"What about us?" Kylo asked.

"First we have to determine if you're qualified to stand trial – essentially, if you have behaved as an officer of the First Order is required, other than the specific charges against you. We're forming a panel. Initial testimony will be given tomorrow morning, which consists of everything you've done in an official capacity – meetings attended, decrees made, orders issued, military disposition, the treaty draft from this morning's work on the Naboo negotiations, your daily work schedule, that sort of thing. Also, theoretically, any offenses."

"Why theoretical?" Kylo's voice was a little softer.

"Hm." Hux seemed to find his food too tasty to be ignored.

"What's an offense?" Rey asked.

Kylo answered. "I think he means a breach of the code of conduct or a criminal offense. In my situation, I'd assume he means using the Force against people."

"Yes," Hux said, barely audible. He frowned and looked off to the side. "I notice you're not reading my thoughts."

"You kicked me out. Tell me if you change your mind. Why theoretical?" Kylo repeated patiently.

"Because I am not reporting any on you," Hux said uncomfortably, squirming in his seat. "None." He rubbed his left eye. "I don't know of anyone else who is, either. What happened before Snoke died is entirely excluded in any case."

"Does that mean-" Rey started, looking between the two of them, "Is that a lie?"

Kylo's face was blank. Hux pursed his lips and said, "Essentially, yes."

"You're saying it didn't happen at all? Is that it?"

"No." Hux dug into his food again, acting flustered.

Quietly and methodically, Kylo said, "He's going to claim to the panel that everything I did was consensual and voluntary, but by his tension about the subject, I would guess it was not, and he agreed only under the duress of our relative ranks and the threat I posed to his life. Essentially, I abused my authority as his commanding officer, but he's not going to admit to it."

Hux sighed, lifted his brows, and shoveled another bite into his mouth. After he swallowed, he said, "There were many times when I explicitly advised you to do it or consented in what I would consider a voluntary fashion. The other times were standard practice. I don't see why you should be pilloried for it."

"I'm sorry for what I did earlier today," Rey said abruptly. "I didn't know … that was wrong. I know that sounds awful that I didn't know."

Hux gave her a tight smile. "I suspected. But it's one thing to have my commanding officer do something in the line of duty and another to find a near stranger doing the same. Please do not repeat that."

"I won't," she said.

"Then we're good," Hux told her. He looked intently at Kylo. "You never did … a tenth of what I know you could have. It wasn't until earlier today that I realized I could tell you no in an absolute fashion and you wouldn't do anything about it. That doesn't mean I was agreeing to it all along, but it means I was giving you contradictory guidance. You should not be taken to task for that."

"I knew from the start you didn't like it," Kylo said. "That first day on the bridge. You were angry I'd do that to you."

Hux pressed his lips together in several different awkward expressions. "Well, as I said, I don't believe any charges will be presented and I know there will be none from me. We'll review what you've done and make an assessment of your fitness to stand trial. It won't be a problem, but we need to get it out of the way before moving on to the actual charges."

"What will happen to the knights?"

"They were acting under orders at all points. They're not responsible. As their commander, you are. They may have committed offenses – I haven't heard. On the other hand, one of them was put to death without due process, so we'll probably arrange to trade charges – ignore the murder and let the others go."

"I'm not happy about that," Kylo said in a low, dangerous voice, "but if it gets the others free, I'll take it. Have they said anything about Gracynn?"

"Yes, but it was largely dismissed. The execution was by the book and well-founded. It doesn't matter if you used a lightsaber or a blaster, or even if you used the Force to make him return. He'd already committed the mutiny. Whatever happened after that is immaterial."

"What about Rey?"

Hux glanced between Kylo and Rey. "Well. Aside from more than I cared to know about Sith traditions, Rey's role will be covered in the criminal portion of the trial tomorrow afternoon. Assuming we don't solicit too much testimony in the morning and we actually get to the trial tomorrow."

"What Sith traditions?" Rey asked.

"One of my early reports to the High Command included the possibility that you, instead of Kylo Ren, had killed Snoke. That's why they were calling you the assassin. That and you're a Jedi."

"A Jedi is not the same thing as an assassin," Rey interrupted. "Why doesn't anyone ask us what happened?"

"I beg to differ, but it's neither here nor there. You're not being asked what happened because you can use the Force," Hux said. "No one wants to talk to you. That's why Snoke had me. I was mentally fit to deal with him on a regular basis, in the manner with which he dealt with people. Most are not."

"That doesn't have anything to do with the Force," Rey said. "It has to do with what he did with it."

"Rey," Hux said, "it is difficult for us to see a meaningful difference. You can blame the dishonor of one prisoner in a group for shooting at his captors, but you'll be safer if you take the blasters away from all of them. We can't take the Force away from you, so we're safer to simply not include you in the process."

She frowned. "So what about the Sith tradition?"

"I was told today that when a Sith apprentice kills their master, they inherit everything of that master. So if you killed Snoke, by Sith 'law', you would become the supreme leader. And Kylo, were he Sith and were he the one who killed Snoke, the same. So by a set of laws we don't recognize as binding, but perhaps you or Kylo or even Snoke did, there might be some justification for Snoke's murder and the subsequent seizing of the throne."

Hux rubbed his forehead. "Governor Geren went on about this at some length. He thought it mattered a great deal who struck the killing blow or whose idea it was to manipulate the other into doing it, as the emperor was Sith and much of our legal system is derived from the Empire. He said it would bring about our doom to interfere in a Sith matter. He was overruled.

"Now, on to something more meaningful, you will probably both be criminally charged for murder, conspiracy to commit murder, and in Kylo's case, treason. Probably be found guilty of the killing to one degree or another, since Snoke is actually dead.

"The sentence is the main point, because it's conceivable there will be none at all and life will go on exactly as before except with the High Command rendering their oaths of loyalty as they should to Kylo Ren as the supreme leader. It's also possible they'll feel execution is the only allowable course, in which case I will excuse myself to return to the _Finalizer_  with as few promises of good conduct as possible and we will see what we can manage as far as warfare. There are a range of options between these extremes."

Kylo frowned. "If they let the knights go and I can break the bond with Rey, then I'll accept whatever the sentence is."

"I'm not breaking the bond," Rey said, an angry edge to her voice, "and you can't break it unilaterally." She wasn't absolutely certain of that, but sure enough to say it.

Hux looked between Rey and Kylo. "I'm not going to let you do it, either, Ren. Don't be a fool." His voice wasn't cold like it normally was. It sounded almost fond. Kylo frowned at him, then sighed and went back to his food, finishing it off. Hux said, "Besides, we'll know more as it goes along. This will probably take a few days to sort out. I'll meet with you for dinner each night."

"Good," Kylo said. "But I'm not being a fool. I will fight for people's lives. I will not fight for a title. I don't want you going to war to keep me in power. The Order is in good hands whether I'm in charge of it or not."

Hux looked across the table at him for several long seconds. "I see. I appreciate your faith in me."


	15. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter of Orderly Lives. It seems likely at this point (2/4/18) that I will write a third series involving the gang's adventures on the First Order core worlds. I would expect publishing in a month or so. I'm still in the storyboarding/outlining stage right now.
> 
> Thanks, everyone, for reading and letting me share my take on Star Wars.

_Day 12_

"You have been found responsible for Snoke's death without premeditation or treasonous intent," Hux said to Kylo shortly after taking a seat in Rey's quarters. "Negligent homicide, essentially. A training error on Snoke's part – he mind-controlled his apprentice incorrectly and was accidentally killed as a result, which triggered the rest of the mess."

Hux smiled thinly. "The sentence is commuted. However, as we discussed was probable, you are to abdicate and leave the First Order. I will arrange a generous severance payment. Give me whatever number seems reasonable to you after you've had a little time to think on it."

"They're paying me? For getting rid of Snoke?" Kylo's face was blank. "Like the assassin they said I was, or she was?"

"They're paying you nothing. I'm paying you to go away and not bother me anymore. It's my money now. I can do what I want with it."

Kylo broke his serious façade with a knowing chuckle at how facetious that was. "Alright. I understand." After a moment, he asked, "Can I have my TIE silencer?"

Hux's mouth opened and stayed that way for a beat, before he said, "Yes. It will have to be repainted. You can't leave under the flag of the Order."

"What about a shuttle?" Kylo asked, still smiling like he knew he was pushing it too far.

"No. Besides, you can only fly one thing at a time. With the TIE silencer, you're at least saving me the trouble of having it returned to factory settings."

"Rey can fly the shuttle," Kylo said.

"Rey never joined the Order. Despite how much you adore her, she's," Hux looked over at her for a moment then back to Ren, "Just Rey."

Rey smiled and pushed a piece of candy over to Hux, one of the last from the tourist box. He nodded to her in thanks and picked it up carefully by the wrapped base. Hux said to Rey, "You are cleared of all charges. The matter is, essentially, closed. Although I don't mind either of you being on the  _Finalizer_ , it will cause questions if you don't make prompt travel arrangements to go elsewhere. Let me know if you need assistance with that." He ate the confection in two careful bites.

"We can transfer to Finn's group when he comes through on the way to your core worlds," Rey said. "It is safe for them to come now, correct?"

"Yes," Hux said. "I will be invested tomorrow morning in my new role. Probably best to have them arrive tomorrow afternoon. Can you let them know?"

Rey nodded. Being confined to quarters had just meant she and Kylo had had plenty of time to contact Finn, Poe, Rose, and Kaydel through the Force, letting them know to stay clear of the rendezvous point until the First Order settled their leadership crisis. Fortunately, the trial had been speedy. Once they realized Kylo Ren was willing to leave without a fuss, taking his knights and Rey with him, the outcome became almost a given. No one wanted the risk that came with trying to kill him, especially when it was clear Hux wouldn't allow it without a fight.

"Will this change anything about their mission to the First Order core worlds?" Rey asked.

Hux shook his head. "No. I will continue the policies Ren enacted and honor the expectations he established through the negotiations. I am sure there will be small adjustments, but I have no issue with allowing them to attempt a more humanitarian solution. Should it fail, like with the trial, I always have the option of force."

Rey frowned, but said nothing. With Kylo in charge, there had been more options. Hux was … quicker to pull the trigger. It meant more pressure to get results.

"Have they settled on your title yet?" Kylo asked.

"No. Last I heard, 'Chief Counselor of the High Command' was being bandied about, but I don't like the sound of it. I would prefer to keep the title I have. I don't want to be the supreme leader. That will always be associated in my mind with darker times. But my stint as grand marshal was … good. Worthwhile. I'll see if I can talk them into it. I think the idea of a title Snoke expressly forbid will sell it to them."

"I know the knights were awakened this morning," Kylo said. "I've spoken with each of them. Was their sentence the same?"

"Yes. They are being transferred to the  _Finalizer_. I will meet with each and make severance arrangements with them. They are to leave the Order without prejudice, just as you. Please do not tell them to request ships of me. I don't know them as I do you and don't feel nearly as generous with them. They've killed a few people I had an interest in and although I know they did it on orders, I'll still be pleased to see the back of them."

Kylo nodded. "Tonza Ren isn't coming back. She was the one in the corvette that the High Command didn't capture. She's not returning."

"Oh?" Hux asked. "Where's she going?"

"She didn't say. Not back to the Order."

"I suppose it's too much to ask that she return the corvette? That belongs to the Order. Not to her."

Kylo just smiled at him. Tonza did what she wanted. Always. Like hell she was going to return that ship to the people who killed Jophesta and exiled the rest of the knights. Hux rolled his eyes, saying, "And I just said I wouldn't give them ships! What about the others? Where are they going?"

"I'll talk with them. We didn't want to go over that until we knew what the sentence was, and if that was even an option." Kylo added quietly, "Hux, you know I wouldn't leave willingly if I didn't think you were what the Order needs. I think this is what's best."

"I know. Call me if you ever need anything," Hux said. "And, also, call me by any means convenient for you. Using your abilities or not. I don't mind speaking with you that way."

"If it's at a distance," Kylo said, "The only way I can do that is with Rey's help."

"I've endured worse," he said with a thin smile. "That will be fine."

* * *

_Day 13_

"Finn!" Rey squealed with delight and ran across the deck of the hangar bay to throw herself in Finn's welcoming arms. Hux and Kylo walked along behind with much more reserve. A handful of laden portage droids lumbered behind them. Beyond them walked two of the Knights of Ren, black-shrouded and helmeted. General Dameron leaned on the support strut of the shuttle ramp, looking at the odd assortment he was about to add to his crew.

"Hey," Poe said when Hux and Kylo reached him. He glanced at Kylo's clothing: unrelieved rich, dark brown in an antique Jedi style, no gloves. "I hardly recognize you when you're not in black. Those two in the back with you?"

"Yes." Kylo looked down at his feet. "The boots are the same."

"Guess so." Poe turned his eyes the other man, letting them roam up and down Hux's body appreciatively, then linger on his face. "Armitage," he said softly, with a sort of throaty purr to the word.

Hux took a few steps closer to him, a friendly distance that put him by Poe's side instead of Kylo's. Kylo turned and went back to the two knights to talk with them. Hux said to Poe, "I did not think we would see one another so soon. It's good to see you."

"Good to see you, too," Poe said. "It's  _always_  good to see you."

Hux squared his shoulders and stood taller, his body angled about three-quarters towards the general. "I've taken some of your advice. It's been surprisingly helpful."

"Yeah?" Poe said.

"Yes," Hux replied. He stepped even closer to Poe. "Could you do me a favor, though?"

"Sure thing. What is it, buddy?"

"Please keep an eye on him for me. I'm very sorry to see him go."

Poe glanced over at Kylo's back. "You know I'd do that anyway. This feels like more, though. Is there something I need to know?"

Hux considered his words for a moment, then said, "He doesn't have any structure right now. Give him a job. Duties. A role. Quite aside from his power, I saw why Snoke liked him as an apprentice. He did everything I put before him, earnest and conscientious. He's very easily led." Hux met Poe's eyes steadily. "Or misled. Keep an eye on him."

Poe scratched the side of his nose and then nodded. "Ah. Gotcha. What about the other two?"

"I don't know them. I was on several assignments with Ren. Never with them. The Knights were Snoke's personal dogs of war. Make of that as you will."

In the background, Finn and Rey finally stopped hugging and came over to the droids. "Do you have room for this much?" she asked him.

"Pff," Finn said. "No problem. This isn't that much stuff. The way you were talking, it would take up the whole cargo hold." He caught the sound of his name and looked over at Kylo and the two helmeted knights. Finn screwed up his courage and walked over to them. "Hi. I'm Finn. You guys are?"

"Nera," said the taller of the two unknowns, matching Kylo for height. She was female, something he really couldn't tell until she spoke. The clothing hid a lot and she was outfitted in an impressive amount of gear.

Finn looked to the other. "Steel," he introduced himself. He was broader across the shoulders than even Kylo, but closer to Finn's height. He looked about as intimidating.

"Weren't there more of you guys?" Finn asked.

"There were," Kylo said, as laconic as his companions. The other two turned blank stares on Finn.

Rey, who had come up behind Finn, said, "I'll talk to you about it later. It's just Nera and Steel coming with us."

"And Kylo, right?" Finn said, checking. "He's coming, too?"

"Yes," Rey answered. "But he'll be landing separately. He's bringing his own ship."

Finn said, "Okay, then let's get this stuff on board and get out of here." He shot a wary look around the hangar bay. It wasn't the same one where he'd been slated for execution, but there were too many similarities for him to be comfortable. Just looking at people moving about in stormtrooper armor was unsettling.

"I'll be with you in a moment," she said.

"No problem." He signaled the droids to follow him. The lead one whistled in acknowledgement. They trundled up the ramp, causing Poe and Hux to move to the side, out of the way. They were still talking in quiet tones to one another.

Rey moved to Kylo. She glanced at the two knights, who took off to follow their stuff onto the ship. Rey put her hands in Kylo's. "Are you okay?"

He gave her a pained smile. "I am leaving my home because they don't want me here. And it's not on fire. It feels strangely incomplete, like I should blow things up on my way out. Yell, or something. Fight." More softly, he said, "I'll be fine. I know you're with me."

"It's normal to be nervous," she told him. "I'll see you on the  _Restitution_ , okay?" Kylo nodded. Their kiss was brief, as Kylo was oddly limited in making public displays of affection. (He was very open about professing his love, but public intimacy left him nervous.) Rey gave his hands a squeeze and headed to the shuttle.

Kylo saw Poe punch Hux lightly on the shoulder, then turn and head inside with Rey. Hux looked pleased with himself as he walked over to Kylo. "Well," the grand marshal said, "let's get you to your TIE silencer."


End file.
